


So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see

by CJthePirate



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Dagworth-Grangers for the win, Family in unsuspected places, Grims, Heraldy, JKR left a lot open so I build my own sandcastle, Minerva is being awesome, Multi, Other, Past Abuse, Ron needs his priorities straightened, Self-Esteem Issues, harry's getting a family, irish/welsh werwolves, muggles who are not muggles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-23 01:05:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 30,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13776423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CJthePirate/pseuds/CJthePirate
Summary: The third year in Hogwarts has ended and Sirius vanished into thin air together with Buckbeak.Now the Tri-Wizard-Tournament is going to be held in Hogwarts and new paths in the live of Harry and his friends are opened.Some will even collide together when one ex-convict and a fugitive werewolf are combined with a sudden and unexpected inheritance.In the end family can be found in the strangest places.





	1. Beginnings end

 

_Where have all the flowers gone_  
_long time passing_  
_where have all the flowers gone_  
_long time ago..._  
_Where have all the flowers gone_  
_gone to graveyards every one_  
_When will we ever learn?_  
_When will we ever learn?_  
                               _Peter Seger_

 

 

**16th November 1981**

 

The sky was crying. It was crying violently and Remus Lupin couldn't help but cry with it. As soon as his feet touched the ground behind the church of the small wizardry town of Godric's Hollow the rain began to pelt his scarred face mercilessly with thick fat droplets and mingled with his tears.

Today was the day wizardry Britain would bury his brother in all but blood. He couldn't remember for the life of him if he had stopped crying since the day he had gotten word of James and Lily Potter's death.Damn the moon, damn the werewolves and a sodden bugger off to Albus Percival Wulfric Dumbledore for sending him away when he friends had needed him most. A fresh wave of guilt branded over the young werewolf. Ever since he had been bitten at the age of four by Fenrir Greyback and his first full moon he hadn't felt this miserable.

He should have been there...here in Godric's Hollow. Protecting his brother, Lily and the cub. He hadn't been there when Lily's son Harry had been born but he had held him a few days after the birth when he had been to Hogwarts to hand in his report to Dumbledore. He's been captivated by the small tyke and had made as much time as he could to visit them often.

He should have been here...instead, he had run through the woods near the coast of Suffolk, trying to sway some wolves away from Fenrir Greyback and Voldemort 's side.  
The wolf inside howled in grief again and Remus felled a massive headache coming. He hadn't eaten as much as should have after the full moon and the constant crying was dehydrating his already depleted resources of liquid in his body. His pack lay in shambles and he couldn't muster the energy to care if he would die or not.

 

The village was deathly silent except for the torrential rain pouring down on everyone. A lot of people with umbrellas or impervious robes and hats stood on the small path to the graveyard.Dumbledore stood at the beginning of a small column of people. Remus swallowed thickly as he saw two wooden caskets peeking out between the mourners.The old headmaster was wearing a slightly more subdued version of his usual robes in deep purple and he seemed to try to convince Minerva McGonagall, Remus old teacher, or something. The debate was getting quite heated but the young man could tell whatever it was ol' Minnie was resisting.

As a student, he often had been subjected to Dumbledore's silver tongue and he knew how hard it was to resist his advances if the old man wanted something. He was glad that nobody had registered his presence so far. He wouldn't have had the tolerance for Dumbledore's jovial manner of speaking at the moment.Remus's sandy-brown already grey-flecked hair was plastered to his head as he stared at the two caskets sitting between the gaggle of mourners. Those wooden boxes looked so innocuous and harmless though Remus knew the cold hard truth. These boxes held the bodies of two of his best friends and the wolf and howled and yowled again in grief. It felt like he was never going to be happy again.

 

The news and the papers had said that Sirius Black had betrayed the Potters. Sweet but brash and sometimes unthinking Sirius.... Remus felt a low growl rumbling in his throat. For once he and Moony were in agreement. Sirius had done a few things that were definitely questionable, like that one event where he had Severus Snape lead to almost certain doom...but he had a lot more better qualities in spades. Which meant that Remus and Moony didn't believe a word of that drivel.

He had never told his friends about it. Wolves didn't trust everyone and werewolves took that to even more paranoid levels. There was a reason for most of the werewolf-packs being family units. If he had learned one thing from his times with other wolves it was that being part of an actual werewolf-packs was a covenant backed up by magic. For other packs, he always would be either an Alpha himself or a loner...in both circumstances someone who couldn’t be trusted right away. It had been on his second mission when one of the female pack-elders had pulled him to the side and had told him that there was literally no chance for him to fulfil his obligation since he had a pack of his own.

Sirius and James had become accepted when they had come as animals to be with him on the full moon. Peter had come later, since he was a rat he was potential prey, but never had met the level of rapport he had with James and Sirius. The fact was it was a pact made by the magic of the participants and intent played a huge role in this. If Sirius really had betrayed them all in a conscious effort Remus would have known it. Hell, even James would have known it the moment Sirius would have gotten the idea in his head. This was how Fenrir always knew who was going to betray him or who could be absolutely trusted in his pack.

He and Sirius hadn't parted on the best of terms on their last meeting, his friend had chafed under Dumbledore's orders and had taken his frustrations out on Remus. Since the old man had sworn Remus to secrecy regarding his missions he couldn't disperse Sirius accusations and doubts and they had gotten in a huge row before Sirius had disapparated. Still, Remus would have known...

Imperious would have been a possibility but Sirius had a strong mind and had trained it, even more, when he had become an animagus. Padfoot's instincts were strong and Sirius often had struggled at the beginning to not be overwhelmed by the dog in intense situations. As an Auror that had made the difference between a plot behind the church and a bed in St. Mungo's. Remus had not been part of the last Fidelius charm but he and Moony were certain that Sirius hadn't been the traitor.

At the first notice, the werewolf had pleaded with Dumbledore to do something with his influence to get his friend out of Azkaban but the old coot had regarded him with a sad face and had spouted the same platitudes and excuses he had said to the Prophet on the day of Sirius capture. That Black had been insane and laughing while blowing up poor Peter and a street full of muggles, that he had confessed when the Aurors had apprehended him. The Blacks were passionate people, some even said most of them were certifiable insane by normal standards but Remus had seen irrational behaviour in Sirius only once. The day he had gotten the news that his little brother had died. Sirius being in Azkaban and James and Peter dead had opened a whole other can of worms. Moony always had felt the presence of his friends even when far away due to the bond they shared. Suddenly the wolf was utterly alone again and the last full moon had been an utter disaster.

 

The rain had died to a slow steady drizzle during his musings and Dumbledore had ceased his argument with Minerva McGonagall. On a silent sign from both of them someone pressed a small burning candle in his hand and like in a trance he followed the group of men who began to carry James and Lily's elaborately decorated black caskets to the graveyard. The next moments passed in a blur of sobbing, tears and guilt.

Someone tapped him lightly on the shoulder and Remus flinched and stiffened. He would rather be alone right now. „Relax, son I come in peace.“ droned a smooth and low baritone he remembered very well.  
Remus whirled around. He had spent enough days at Potter's Field to recognize that voice and it simply couldn't be possible. There right next to him stood a man in black formal robes with purple trimmings and looked awfully familiar. An unruly mob of salt and pepper hair, combed back to resemble a small lion's mane paired with an impressive grey moustache that hid the laughing lines around a sadly smiling mouth and dark blue eyes that gazed at him with interest.  
He recoiled violently from the spectre of his past.

"Charlus!?“

The older man raised his hands. „Relax son. I know my brother would have laughed his head off for this...seems like I still got it.“ Remus simply stood there in the rain, gaping.  
"I'm sure James mentioned an Uncle once...“ With a sigh, the stranger threw a flower on the already covered grave and pointed at a small plate that was inserted at the foot of the gravestone.  
"I'm his uncle Fleamont. Charlus would have liked them to be buried with the family...so I arranged for that.“ Inscribed on the small slightly glowing slab of metal were two names:

 

**Charlus Jacob Potter * 2. 4. 1902 + 23. 7. 1979**

**Dorea Thalita Black-Potter * 23. 6. 1903 + 25. 6. 1979**

 

James parents had died the year before Harry's birth. Dorea had been infected with Dragon Pox and survived for three months. Charlus had been murdered one month after her burial. Both had been buried at the family graveyard at Potter's Field, their ancestral home. Shortly after his father's death, James had hidden the location of the manor and nobody had been on the property since. It was literally impossible and absolutely fatal for strangers to gain access to the Potter's home. „James wrote to me...after Charlus died. Then half a year ago no answers came back for my letters and then two weeks ago the tapestry showed his death...“  
Remus' fingernails were pressing hard into the flesh of his hands now desperate to not let out a howl of anguish.

 

Suddenly small nimble fingers tore at his hands. „Don't do that! You'll break your fingers like this.“ Moony snarled at the bossy tone and tried to wrench his hands away. How could anybody else understand the pain he was rolling around in at the moment. He was alone.

A young woman stood at his side, dabbing a small white handkerchief to the self-inflicted wounds on his hands.  
He saw riotous black curls flying like a halo around a tear-streaked face with a strong and firm jaw and then James hazel eyes stared at him disapprovingly. "You should be glad they didn't cut too deep. This will be hurting for a while.“ and without much aplomb, the small woman wrapped the linen cloth around his hand and turned to Fleamont.  
„Dad says he's got a hold on Dumbledore for the moment. We will be waiting at the gate.“ and with a swirl of black glossy hair and a furious frown, she turned towards the Cemetery gate.

Fleamont snorted without humour in his voice. „Jean's my granddaughter and she absolutely loved her cousin although they didn't see each other often.“  
Remus swallowed thickly. She had appeared and vanished like a ghost. „She looks like the sister he always wanted...“ fresh tears spilt over and ran down his face.  
Fleamont raised an eyebrow at the young werewolf.  
"Where's that boy Dorea liked so much? "  
An unhappy high chortle tore from Remus' throat. "Sirius? Didn't you get the news? He's in Azkaban at the moment and according to them“ he made a sweeping gesture with his hands, "he's responsible for all this!“

Fleamont shock his head. „One thing I learned from Dorea when we were in school together is that family is everything for a Black. That boy had practically adopted her as his mother and I know that once a Black makes up his mind about something he stays on it. She was his family, James was his family and Sirius would have rather died than betray family!“

The blond werewolf stared at the ground grinding his teeth. "He was...IS Harry's godfather.“  
Fleamont's face turned to stone in an instant. "Is he? Harry's survived the attack as far as I know. This another reason for me then to talk to Albus...Excuse me, son but I guess my family can't stall him any longer.“

Jean, the young woman from before, stood right next to a tall man with the impossible Potter hair and furiously waved her hands at her grandfather.  
"Maybe once this is all settled we can write and try to find reason in this mess. James liked you lots...maybe then I can you show the letters and family photos. Give you advice over tea or something. You sure look like you need it at the moment.“

 

Remus could only watch, still fighting with his tears as Fleamont and immediate family descended on Dumbledore like a pride of lions on an unsuspecting antelope.

The rain began to pour down in earnest again when he turned to the apparition point.

Half a year later he remembered Fleamont's words when he lost his job on a miserable May morning. However the owls he did send came back either with no answer or unopened letters and soon Remus gave up. He had more pressing matters, like his survival and how he could hold a roof over his head to tend to.

Clearly, all those fine words had just been meant to placate him...who would invite a werewolf into their home. It was laughable and Remus had believed it.  
He didn't write any more letters and tried to forget about the strange meeting in the cemetery, though every time he visited Godric's Hollow on James birthday he was reminded about the wistful sad smile James cousin had shown him when he turned on the apparition point.

He didn't know back then that he would see exactly the same smile later on a slightly different face.


	2. Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius comes to Hogwarts and Remus meets Harry and friends onthe train.

_Amazing Grace_  
_how sweet that sound_  
_that saved a wretch like me_  
_I once was lost but now I'm found_  
_was blind but now I see._

 

**End of June 1993**

Freedom would forever smell like fish and chips. No one was paying attention to the half-starved mangy black dog, who had become an additional fixture around the old chippy booth at the harbour of the small town of Boddam. He often loitered around the booth and begged for scraps and pets. Since he had stepped on the rocky beach at the beginning of the month he had become the unofficial guard dog of the harbour. Most of the fishermen called him Blackguard and everyone wondered where he vanished to when the night began to creep in.

Padfoot was barely visible in the shadows, his grey eyes glowed in the light of the old street lamp and the cold wind ruffled his shaggy coat. It was time to move on.

After seeing the traitor and essentially murder of his best friends on a piece of newspaper he had swum for a week to get away from the small island of Azkaban in the north sea. Then, right at the moment when he had abandoned all hope of getting his revenge and was ready to drown he had felt the stones of the harbour under his paws. He had arrived at night and had curled up in the shadow of a little shack to get warm again.  
The next day an old lady had petted his head and had fed him scraps of fried fish. The dog had been so exhausted he had revelled in the attention. Since then two weeks had gone by and he had gorged himself on fish and chips and the occasional rat. The rat was just out of spite...he had to practice for the traitor.  
The dog whined and licked his chops. Sometimes, after such a long time as a dog, it was difficult to remember who had been once before he became Padfoot. Often he had felt himself slip away and the dog had clamped viscous jaws around the wizard half of his being. The rat had betrayed them all and when he would lose himself James and Lily would never get their justice.  
For once Sirius Black could say ignorance was truly bliss. He had seen the wanted posters on the lamp posts of the harbour and if only one of the normal people working here would have known who they were harbouring in their midst all hell would have been breaking loose.  
Instead, he had found an old lady and some nice old men and the dog in him had latched onto the first kindness been shown to him in years. Padfoot had decided it would be better to stay a bit longer and the wizard had agreed.  
As a dog dreams didn't get to him so much.  
But now was the time to move on. Summer was coming to an end and he had a mission to full fill, a traitor to kill and a godson to protect.  
The next morning Gelinda Murray found no dog waiting for her at the booth with a wagging tail. Instead of her friend there on the stairs stood a basket overflowing with an assortment of fresh fish. When Gelinda sorted them she found the biggest piece of amber she had ever seen together with a small scrap of paper on the bottom of the basket.  
The paper seemed to be parchment and there was only the print of a giant paw on it.

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Remus Lupin was looking at the depleted ruins of his childhood home. It wasn't exactly a ruin but you had to squint very hard to imagine someone actually living there.  
Remus had lived there until this moment and he expected to return to the depleted shack when his new job wouldn't work out.  
He was part grateful and part resentful at Albus Dumbledore.  
Where had been his help when Remus had needed it most? Now he had the job opportunity as a teacher in Hogwarts, it was a long dream coming true but Remus had no illusions regarding his success. Someone would find out about his condition and then he would have to leave. It was an endless circle of fail and repeat.  
Though he was returning to the school of his dreams and for just this time the werewolf decided to live in the moment.  
With one last mournful look towards his shattered childhood, he shrunk his luggage and apparated to the next town to inform his boss of a new job opportunity and to get some supplies. He would have to stock up on pain medication and chocolate. Also, he had to found out how to come to Kings Cross in September without a car. He had much to do in the next months.  
The letter from Hogwarts floated down in front of the doorstep.

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**August 1993**

Padfoot didn't know how many miles he had run. He had stopped at Remus old place but the wolf hadn't been at his ancestral den, it had looked like he hadn't been there for quite some time and for a few days the dog howled his despair into the night.  
He hadn't found any evidence for any young ones living in the dwelling and the wizard in him at provided him with the thought of the pup's further family. He remembered the drafting of the will and how James and Remus had agonized over the legal implications of the wording. If something had happened to James and Lily, Harry would have gone to his godfather Sirius. If Sirius was unavailable Remus would have been allowed to take custody. Someone had circumvented or simply ignored the will...  
But surely this person wouldn't have been dumb enough to leave the little one...there..!?

Panicked he had raced through the night and only in a few days he had found his way to London. Sirius remembered the letter Lily had received about her sister's wedding and the new home she had gotten at the end of school.  
Petunia had moved as near to the big City and as far from Cokeworth as she had dared and money would allow it and both dog and wizard had to roll their eyes when they followed memory lane to Privet Drive in Surrey.  
Surely, back then when he had the displeasure of getting to know Petunia on James and Lily's wedding he had known that the woman wouldn't have recognized class when it bit her in the face.

Privet Drive 4 was as bland and insignificant as everything else around it and every lamp inside was lit.  
Padfoot could hear quite the commotion inside. Obviously Petunia was still married to one Vernon Dursley. Both Sirius and James had shared an intense dislike for the big oaf and Padfoot often had contemplated biting the fat muggle in the ass as soon as the opportunity arose.  
They had a visitor, the dog had seen the whale of a woman arrive during when he had reached the address and was appealed at the way she basically seemed to burst out of the tasteless tweed suit she wore. Her totally overfed bulldog had spotted him in the hedges before it became dark and started yapping at him almost immediately. Padfoot simply had stepped out from the hedge in all his giant black furred and snarling glory and had whapped the annoying creature on the head. The bulldog had turned tail and hadn't dared to set a foot into the garden since then.

The screaming inside the house got louder and more aggressive. Vernon was yelling at someone, probably at Harry and Padfoot snarled silently in his hiding place. No one should talk to his pup this way.  
Vernon got even louder and let the window panes rattle. For an irritating muggle, he had quite a set of magic lungs. Suddenly the entrance flew open and dog and wizard found themselves eye to eye with the very goal of their searching quest.  
It was like James had never left. Unruly hair, gangly build and some old-fashioned glasses. The boy was pulling a trunk and an Owl-cage behind him. The screams got louder and suddenly Vernon Dursley stood in the door, his face purple in the yellow light of the doorway and that fat dog still hanging onto his trousers.  
He screamed at the top of his unfortunately good lungs:”GET BACK IN HERE! GET BACK AND MAKE HER RIGHT!”  
Padfoot was seconds before simply bursting from the hedges and launching himself and the fat man.  
Harry whirled around, black wand in hand and look of utter disgust and loathing on his face as he pointed the black stick at his uncle.

James had been a temperamental idiot at times when riled properly, though if Harry had gotten something besides her green eyes from his mother it was her legendary temper. Sirius had known that since the day Harry had been born when he had socked his Dad in the face in a screaming fit while being only hours old.  
James anger had been like a summer storm. Easy build up and terrifying displays but over very quickly. Lily though got as cold as a glacier in the beginning and when she exploded it was like a cold logical hurricane that left no survivors in its wake. Sirius had been caught in the crossfire between James and Lily often enough to tell that the boy had gotten from both in equal measures.

Padfoot didn't understand what the pup hissed at the whale of the man in the door. Judging by Dursley's face it wasn't very kind and quite threatening. The next second Harry whipped around, trunk still in tow and began to walk down the street.  
The dog couldn't help but follow. It had been so long since he had seen the pup...his pup!

James had been tall as an adult but his son was more on the short side and entirely to gangly and thin for it to healthy. He smelled of hunger and neglect. Padfoot growled deep in his chest and followed from the shadows.  
Like lightning, the boy whirled around. Had he heard something?  
The black dog stood still as a statue in the shadows, desperately willing himself to make absolutely no sound. Then Harry lit a Lumos on his wand and the bright light reflected on the glowing dog's eyes.

The next few seconds happened in a blur of too many colours and light.  
Harry stumbled over his trunk, Padfoot took a step towards the fallen boy and in the next moment, a purple double-decker bus exploded into existence next to the pavement. The dog had to flee...the horror and surprise on the pup's face stung more than the blinding light of the Knight Bus.

Harry had taken his trunk with him...he was leaving the house. That meant Hogwarts! Sirius would find him there...and the traitor masquerading as a pet for that Weasley boy too.  
Maybe now he could do something right.

 

**1st September 1993**

Padfoot was hungry. It was like a rat gnawing at his insides and thinking of rats made the dog furious. The traitor was at Hogwarts. He had seen the rat on the red-headed boy's arm. Moony was also here, he had seen him depart the train at Hogsmeade Station.

Seeing his old friend, although decimated, worn and tired had filled the old dog with an immense joy and Sirius entertained dreams of talking to Remus ...but first he had to placate his stomach.  
Unfortunately, wizards proved to be immune to his animal charm. The most he'd got was a kick in the ribs and crate thrown in his direction. In the evening he was getting desperate and decided to look for one of the entrances to the castle.

Everything had been like he had never left the school. The same banners, the same portraits and halls and the dog had gotten careless.  
He turned a corner and an insisted yowls hit his ears right before a paw with claws descended onto his snout.  
Yelping and confused the dog retreated again in the shadows. Before him, bottle brush bristled tail held high over his head stood a cat. Orange-golden fur, a small ruff around his slightly squashed face in the form of a small lions mane and an oddly disapproving gleam in his golden eyes.

The cat flicked it's tail and raised a paw and Padfoot whined anxiously but stayed put. Claws to face was not a nice feeling. His assailant turned ar the corner and returned after a minute with, oh praise the lord and magic, with a small piece of beef in his jaws. Padfoot let out a small bark and as soon as the cat had displayed out the meat in front of him he had devoured it.  
It seemed like he had found an ally.

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Remus still had trouble banishing the cobwebs from his mind.  
As soon as he had boarded the train in Snowdon. Remus had been surprised to find out that the “Hogwarts Express” was actually an actual train all year round. Sometimes even muggles could ride on it during the summer season as a tourist attraction. Magic was to be held at a minimum on those days and a small contingent of Aurors was accompanying the customers, disguised as conductors. Remus found it was a brilliant solution.

He had been especially tired when he started his journey from Wales to Scotland. The full moon had been only days ago and he had fallen into a light sleep until the train arrived at Kings Cross.

Three kids had invaded his compartment as the train left London. Moony, always on edge and right under the surface on these days perked up and began analysing scents.  
Two boys and one girl judging by the voices he heard. He decided to feign sleep a little while longer since he was going to be their teacher and he wanted to know his pupils.  
One of the boys had the musty and loamy smell of the outdoors. A garden overflowing with greenery and life and the slightly pungent scent of stale water...a garden pond maybe? There was even a whiff of rodent and absent-mindedly Remus registered the chittering voice of a mouse or a rat. The boy had a rodent as a pet.

The other one smelled familiar. Underneath the slightly alarming acrid stench of malnutrition and neglect, Moony had to think about old socks, he detected the light aroma of fresh baked bread and lemon. There was also a slight spattering of broom polish and leather and Remus closed his eyes tight. He knew that smell and guilt began to gnaw at his insides. This was a confrontation he wasn't looking forward to.  
Suddenly he was engulfed in the fresh smell of a summer storm after a hot day and a voice next to him hissed “Crookshanks!”  
A soft paw batted his face and from beneath half-closed eyelids, he saw a ginger cat, probably a Persian judging by that odd short face, staring at him from the protecting embrace of a small girl with the wildest mob of hair on her head he had ever seen.  
“Let the man sleep, he looks exhausted." she whispered to her pet and took her seat right in front of him.

Moony was oddly silent. Normally the wolf didn't tolerate people he didn't know in his personal space, especially on after-moon days but now it was...content? The wolf was laying back and low in Remus conscience, reminiscing about the rainy nights in the forest.  
It was an entirely odd experience and left Remus slightly unsettled.

Instead, he began to pay more attention to his surroundings.  
“Who d'you reckon he is? “ came the gruffly hissed question furthest from the window. “Remus J. Lupin. “ came the prompt slightly exasperated answer from the girl. “How d'you know that? “ the boy had a slight mocking undertone.  
“It's on his case,” she replied and pointed to his luggage in the net above him.  
“Wonder what he teaches? “ Remus had the feeling that the boy didn't like him much, he wondered why.  
The Werewolf could almost hear the eye-roll in the answer. “It's obvious there's only one vacancy, isn't it? Defence Against the Dark Arts.”  
“Well I hope he's up to it ...” came the derisive answer.”He looks like one good hex would finish him, doesn't he? Anyway, what were you going to tell us?”  
Remus had to hide a snort and turned it into a snore in the middle. That boy was a doubting Thomas it seemed and quite a bit rude. Well, himself and his friends had been right prats at this age, though he should nip such behaviour in the bud when it occurred.  
The next few minutes were a retelling of Harry's times before the train. Remus was dismayed and delighted in equal measure to hear that Sirius Black was out of Azkaban. If he only had gotten out now, he probably was as mad as a march hare. Everyone and his mum were saying that he was going after Harry. If he had survived Azkaban for so long the Aurors were in for a treat. Sirius had been dangerous before with a wand when he was working for the Ministry but now he would be positively deadly. Still, Remus tried to believe that his old friend was innocent. In the end, Sirius probably would get the end he always wanted, going out like a blaze taking some good for nothing idiots with him. He hoped Sirius would wise up and leave the country before it came to that...though Harry was a responsibility Sirius had never shied away from.

His friends were telling Harry to stay put and not to go looking for trouble, while the girl seemed even more concerned than usual. Harry himself was slightly frustrated by the well-meant warnings and Remus tuned out the chatter of the kids for a few moments to remember the days when he had been young and thirteen.  
Back then he had been painfully shy and frightened, his father always had stressed that nobody was to find out about his condition and he had lived in perpetual fear of discovery.  
The kids were outright bickering among each other when the ginger cat took a swipe at the pockets of the boy by the door. Just normal kids doing kids stuff, Remus was on the cusp of falling asleep again, still immersed in the scent of an oncoming summer storm when he registered the rapidly plummeting temperature.

The Dementor attack had been swift and without mercy. Remus was still tittering on the edge of a nervous breakdown as he watched Harry and his friends, Ron the red-headed Weasley boy and Hermoine Granger, turn towards the entrance of Hogwarts. They were still munching on the chocolate he given out to counter the Dementor's lingering presence.

Remus wished he and Harry would have met under different circumstances and part of him still fought with the desire of simply talking to him about his parents. It probably would never happen, at least not like he wished it would go. He had given up that opportunity the moment he didn't fight Dumbledore on his decision to bring Harry to Lily's sister.  
For the moment he was content with simply watching and observing the boy. His mind was with Harry when he turned his feet towards the school but the smell of a fresh summer storm on a hot day followed him to sleep that night.

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**September to December 1993**

The beginning of the school year had run by in a whirl of activity for Sirius Black. Together with the ginger cat, who he had dubbed Lion for his tufted tail and small mane, he had explored the castle at night always keeping an eye out for the traitor.  
Lion would help him to stay in the shadows, warned him against patrolling teachers, ran interference with the different familiars already residing in the castle and would share his food with him.  
The hidden passages were exactly as he had left them except the one that had led to an now abandoned liquor shop in Hogsmeade. It had collapsed in itself probably a few years after he had left the school.  
The house elves had taken a liking to them since both the dog and the cat were making short work of every rodent they could find around the kitchen. Padfoot couldn't help himself, every time he caught a rat he imagined his jaws clamping around the traitor's still twitching body.  
Wormtail should be glad if Sirius would get to him only as a dog.

The only problem he still encountered was the entrance to Gryffindor Tower. Lion simply had padded towards the portrait of the Fat Lady and after an imperious yowl and a disgusted snort by the portrait the door had swung open, only to close immediately when she spotted Padfoot trying to streak past the cat into the common room.  
In impotent rage had the dog raked his paws over the canvas until Sirius without realising had transformed back into a human. The lady had let loose a scream of terror and Sirius had simply lost it. Laughing and cackling like a maniac he had produced a knife, he had stolen from the kitchen a few days before from the pockets of his torn and tattered prison robes and cut great stripes out of the frame. The Fat Lady had fled to a different portrait and only a painful bite on his ankle from Lion had brought him out of his episode.  
The next day had been utter chaos and Sirius had opted to stay out of the castle for a few days or maybe weeks. Lion had promised to keep an eye on Wormtail and he would bring him to Padfoot if he could get his paws on him.

Then came the day of the Quidditch game against Hufflepuff. Sirius, quite proud on behalf of James opted to watch the game form one side of the empty higher rafters. The game had been a delight despite the raging rainstorm howling around the pitch. For a moment the eyes of boy and dog had aligned during a risky dive of Harry while a lightning blast had illuminated the rafters. Sirius had been content, so content that he only realised at the last minute what was happening. His eyes had followed the young wizard chasing after the snitch, corkscrewing higher and higher in the air, closely followed by his Hufflepuff counterpart. Then the coldness registered and he heard a baby screaming. He couldn't stay. The crying only got louder and with a last gaze towards the pitch, he could see Harry falling down from the sky hunted by writhing shadows in death shrouds. Then blessed darkness took him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was a lot easier to write than I thought. I'd like to take the story from everyones perspective...let's see if I succeed. ^^


	3. Getting to know you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First classes at Hogwarts.

_Fishing for a friend_   
_Can't remember when it was dark_   
_Or the sun coming up_   
_Far across the ocean alone_   
_While numb bears at home_   
_Said I could never get there_   
_Never get there_   
_Of Monsters and Men „Numb Bears“_

 

**6th October 1993**

It was good being on track again. He was nervous and while he desperately was trying to hide the bullets of sweats running down his forehead, he was elated that now could do what he did best.  
Teaching had always been a pet peeve of Remus back in school and he had spent many a night with trying to cram knowledge into James, Sirus and Peter's brain. James and Sirius hadn't been much of a problem, those two only needed a push in the right direction. Of course, Peter had been a real piece of work. Wormtail hadn't been dumb, far from that actually, but had held no interest in learning for the sake of getting better in something.  
The result had been that Peter had taken several more remedial lessons in a slew of subjects in their final year than Sirius. Laziness had been the bane of his existence and in the end maybe his undoing.  
Of course, Remus didn't believe the tall tales the Daily Prophet used to print on that specific day twelve years ago but he often wondered what it had been that had set Sirius against his friend. Whatever it had been it must have been something quite severe though Remus had stopped asking himself about this a long time ago.

His first class in Defence Against the Dark Arts. He had made a small lesson plan for the first weeks of school. Minerva had smiled approvingly while reading it and everyone besides Severus Snape had been extremely helpful with pieces of information about his students.  
A lot of the names were familiar and the scarred man discovered that the children of most of his year mates were the same ponces and pampered princesses their parents had been. The Weasley twins were a pleasant surprise and Remus had to hold back a laugh when everyone told him they were going to be worthy successors of the Marauders. He was sure James was laughing his head off wherever he was now at the dour expression Minerva held whenever she talked about the two boys.  
There were a lot of new names also and among them, Harry's name stood out like a colourful flag on a drab day.

Neville Longbottom was another old memory. He'd only taken a quick look at the welcoming feast. The boy looked like his father Frank with short dark brown curls and a pleasant face with big brown eyes. He had more of Alice's gentle demeanour though. He certainly had the propensity for accidents like Frank. He seemed kinda subdued and frightened and Remus couldn't hold it against the boy, he himself had had the pleasure of knowing Augusta Longbottom. She was a stern woman and had been an even sterner Auror but Neville didn't seem to flourish under her special brand of parentage.  
Harry also was often a subject during the talks in the staff room and both Minerva and Filius Flitwick had a lot to say for both Harry and his friends. Ron the youngest of Molly Weasley's boys seemed to be all right and a typical boy, Gryffindor and Weasley. He seemed to be liked by almost anyone so far. Minerva hinted on some self-esteem issues but Remus would have to take a look himself to get a clear picture of the boy.  
Hermione Granger was a point of contention between the two head of houses. Minerva had the habit of lording Granger's place in Gryffindor over Filius and Remus had the feeling that the old cat often saw herself in the small girl. She certainly was intelligent and talented enough. Both were in accordance that great thing could be expected from Harry and both of his friends.

Everyone was already seated as he stepped into the classroom. The students were quietly talking among themselves while sharpening quills or ruffling through the parchment. Naturally, Remus gaze locked on Harry. The boy with his unruly mop of black hair sat in the middle a bit off to the left side and was flanked by Ron on the right and Hermione on his left side. Neville was sitting behind Hermione and was nervously stacking parchment on his desk. A great ginger cat sat by his foot and licked its paws. The girl was reading and the werewolf smiled, her wild brown curls framing and shielding her face while she turned the pages. “Arithmancy a treatise on Numerology through the Ages” was a thick tome and definitely no reading material for a third year. Still, the small girl seemed to know what she was reading.

With a decisive thump, he placed his old worn suitcase on the desk. Every gaze was suddenly on him. “Put your books and quills away. This is going to be a practical lesson, you won't need them.”  
Puzzled wide eyes stared at him. He fought down a small sliver of anger. Honestly what useless nincompoops had taught here before? There was frantic rustling as everyone placed the items back into their bags and with a quiet “Follow me.” he led them away to the now empty staff room.

Peeves had been an expected obstacle on the way there and the marauder in Remus thought he had handled that situation admirably. The poltergeist had floated away while muttering dark curse words under his breath and tried to remove the chewing gum, he had wanted to stuff into the locket of Filch's broom closet, from his nose.  
Remus sense of smell had always been superior since Greyback had decided to take a bite out of him when he was four. He knew what he smelled from his students right now was respect and a touch of admiration. It was a hard concept to explain to non-werewolves, as the best comparison he only could say it smelled a bit like sugared pear and salted caramel.  
For a few seconds, he bathed in the awe of his students and took a deep breath to submit this scent to his memory. Suddenly the acrid stench of fear mixed with the smell of loamy wet earth filled the space behind him. Neville could as well have screamed his fear out in the open.

Finding Snape sitting in the previously prepared staff room was an unpleasant surprise that got only worse when Neville literally cowered in fear behind him. Snape wouldn't have been Snape if he didn't depart with a terrible sneer and a nasty parting shot to Neville's pride and self-esteem. Remus saw him pale at the words of the dour Potions master and decided to slightly change the plans for the lesson of the day.  
“Actually I wanted Mr Longbottom to help me with the preparations for today's lesson.” he grinned right in Snape's rapidly darkening face. “I'm sure he'll perform admirably.” Slytherin's head of house swept away in a wave of dramatically flaring robes and the sour smell of disappointment. He would have to deal with the man in the evening. An appointment he wasn't exactly looking forward to since Dumbledore had decreed that Snape was to provide Remus with the Wolfsbane Potion as long as he stayed at Hogwarts.

The children spilt into the now empty room and the wolf took time to get to know their scents when they passed him. At first, he had been horrified when he had caught himself sniffing after his classmates in his sixth year. Until then he always had tried to suppress it but when his friends had begun their animagus training some smells had been too powerful to ignore. He had always wondered what had been so appealing to James scent until Prongs, Padfoot and Wormtail had joined him on his monthly escapades.  
After the first missions to the werewolves in Europe, he had learnt to appreciate this ability as a gift.  
Saiorse, a pack elder in Ireland had taught him how to categorize the different scents and always to trust his instincts. In the end, the Irish werewolves had stayed neutral in the conflict with Voldemort and Remus had begun to find it quite useful.  
Scents defined persons, showing to those who could perceive it the heart of their personality. The myth that werewolves and wolves alike could smell emotions weren't so far-fetched in the end.

Neville, when he wasn't fearful, smelled like tilled earth in spring with fresh hay and a hint of Bergamot. Lavender Brown under all this perfume she used quite extensively smelled like candied ginger tempered with a dash of sour lemon. The girl seemed to be all together quite sweet but had a mean streak lurking under all that pleasantness. Parvati, right next to her, smelled mostly of cinnamon and sweet pepper giving her a rather open but fiery personality.  
Draco Malfoy unsurprisingly smelled strongly of Bergamot with too much lemon. There was the hint of something like sulphur meaning that despite the potential the boy already had been literally poisoned by his father's beliefs and jealousy.

Quite a lot of the Slytherin students, at least those of old families, smelled quite bland and often he caught a whiff of iron. The kids where hardening themselves and most of their smells were numbed down. Remus wasn't surprised. Most pure-blood parents tried to stomp out any sign of individuality in their kids at an early age. A young Sirius Black had been the best example before the Potters had taken him in. Though Sirius had rebelled and so far prevailed.

Harry pressed past him towards the door and Remus breathed him in like a drowning man desperate for air. Now after a few days with good food and sleep the boy held the aroma of bread fresh from the oven, orange blossoms and pine. He reminded Remus of home and Lily's cooking. Ron Weasley right behind him smelled like the outdoors on a farm. Camp-fire wood and hay but underneath it, all was the hard metallic smell of iron. Ron's anger would be his biggest problem in the years to come it seemed. All the Weasley boys had Molly's temper and she had been quite a handful back in the day. Hopefully, he could overcome his personal issues.

Remus turned to call the last stragglers in the room and was engulfed by a summer storm again. The fresh and citrus odour of soaked freshly cut wood, clear water and a hint of ozone. Instinctively he had closed his eyes and inhaled deeply when a quiet “Professor, are you all right?” jerked him out of his trance.  
Big chocolate brown eyes with flecks of amber stared  
up into his face and she was so near to him that he almost could count the freckles on the bridge of her nose. A flash of curiosity reared its head in him. What made her so interesting for the wolf in him.  
Wild...At the moment there was no better explanation than a certain wildness to her scent and looks. She didn't seem to be afraid of him and in a moment of clarity, he remembered that she had been the only one who hadn't been afraid of Snape. Her smell reminded him of something...someone. Someone he had met long ago for just a short time. He dared to look up and concern had darkened the girls' eyes to umber.  
“I'm OK Miss Granger, please go on.” With a small nod and a slight grin, the small girl released the arm of his jacket she had gripped quite tightly and stepped through the door.

The lesson went on just as he had predicted and he was disappointed to find out that Snape was Neville's Boggart. Hopefully, that would change when the boy would get older.  
The wild card in that whole scenario was Harry and Remus had an eye on him all the time. While the boy and his red-haired friend regarded the spectacle with both thoughtful and nervous expressions, Hermione seemed to fidget from side to side the whole time. It became more pronounced when Lavender and her girlfriends begun to screech at the various monsters the Boggart turned into especially when Ron's boggart turned out to be a giant spider. There was a look of quiet determination and concentration on her face and she wound one of her wild curls around and around her fingers as the screams became louder and more numerous.  
Then it was Harry's turn and he turned all his senses on Lily's son. The boy seemed only mildly afraid at first when the Boggart flew towards him that in the second Harry's gaze locked with the new eyes of the creature the spirit had turned into before, Remus flew into action.  
The white orb of the moon surrounded by wispy, almost invisible clouds hovered before him for a second until Neville stepped in and finished the creature off with a laugh.  
Harry seemed disappointed at his intervention but didn't say anything. His friends regarded their teacher with strange looks and tried to sooth the boy's pride but Remus was glad he had stepped in when he had done it. Though in the end he was standing in an empty room and stared out the window where the rain splashed against the windows.

The next day the werewolf was scared out of his wits for a few hours when after breakfast he discovered that he unconsciously had begun following the girl around. It was like the beast in him was actively seeking her and her calming wild scent. The wolf felt interested and protective, though Remus didn't know why and Moony wasn't exactly forthcoming with an explanation. So far he was only ever hovering on the premises or stayed near their table far longer than was necessary and basked in the feeling of quiet fascination and calmness. Remus just could hope that Moony would find out whatever was so fascinating to him and would desist with this strange behaviour.

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Hermione took a long breath in between classrooms. She tried to compartmentalize all the new impressions she had caught onto since stepping off the Hogwarts Express. In the next second, she felt fur brushing against her legs and some of the tension left her like the air in a pricked balloon.  
Crookshanks had been a godsend in the last few days, although Ron seemed to be almost violently opposed to the ginger cat. The moment she had stepped in the Menagerie she had known that a new friend was waiting for her within. The Tomcat had prowled around her legs almost immediately and for the first time, Hermione had bought something without thinking it through.  
Now every time the walls began to close around her he would jump into her lap and demand to be petted.  
They all had met in Diagon Alley and she had been worried by the quiet anger Harry seemed to be projecting. Her friend remained tight-lipped about the reasons behind his premature stay in the Leaky Cauldron. He only hinted at a rather violent argument with his relatives and that Minister Fudge had organized his rooms.  
He seemed thinner and pale as the last time she had seen him and like always he flinched when she embraced him as a greeting. Ron had hit a growth spurt during the summer and although she seethed a bit about her own short stature she found it worrisome that Harry was barely half a head taller than her.  
Delayed growth ...pale skin and bad eyesight from an early age...  
She knew her friends' situation with his relatives wasn't ideal but all the signs she had picked up from Harry during the time she got to know him were indicating that he suffered from long-term malnourishment. He often had mentioned that he had seen his first full-course buffet at the Welcoming Feast in the first year. Fred and George had talked about bars in front of his window in the second year but no one had believed them.  
During the end of the first year she had discreetly begun to prepare Harry's plates for him and until now no one had caught on. She resolved to talk with her parents as soon as she could.

Ron was a puzzle to her this year. Normally they got together like fire and water and the sparks were always spectacular. She hadn't forgotten that he had been far from nice to her in the beginning though she believed people could and would change with time. At least everyone deserved a second chance.  
This year, though he had behaved like a total git from the start. The first few sentences from him were making fun of her and her study habits and it only had gotten worse when they had gone into the Owl Emporium. She couldn't understand how he could find fault with Crooks. Given both hadn't liked each other the moment they had met but it was ludicrous to accuse a cat of attempted murder when it was only doing what was its nature. Ron did have a cage for his rat, he just didn't use it. In the end, Hermione hoped that all the problems would solve themselves and she would make peace with the read head.

Her room-mates were beginning that stage of adolescence where they began to screech quite shrilly at everything they found either delightful, vexing or scary. In the first night, Lavender and Parvati had immediately begun to giggle and gossip with each other about the most useless things. The first days of school Hermione had found herself often with a blanket, a book and Crookshanks as her only company to get at least half a night of sleep.  
Professor McGonagall had presented her with a time tuner on the second day. She had been astounded that Hermione still wanted to attend her courses and had hammered on the Code of Conduct for Time-travellers. The novelty of the device had worn off after three days. Three days for everyone else, almost six for her. Hermione often wondered if the use of the time turner would age her. So far she had managed thanks to her colour-coded schedules.  
Muggle Studies proved to be quiet and entirely outdated. Some of the things Professor Babbling had written on the Blackboard had smacked distinctively Victorian, but it was interesting to see from where Malfoy and his cronies were pulling their beliefs. So far nothing had discouraged her of the opinion that they all were absolute idiots.  
Potions class was the same as usual. Snape and Malfoy were still both being giant gits and out to prove themselves to be quite the nuisances. She had an inkling that Snape didn't like her “helpful” tendencies but it was infuriating to watch him teach. As far as his performance in the classroom could be called teaching. She had a healthy respect for teachers but Professor Snape used a method of teaching her parents often had told her was long extinct in British classrooms.

Then there was the new mystery of the new DADA teacher this year. Normally faculty didn't need to use the train to the school so Hermione had coloured herself surprised to find an adult in one of the compartments. He had looked old and worn and his clothes had seriously seen better days and she had noticed early in her conversation with Harry and Ron that the stranger was faking to be asleep. Normally she would have said something but a strange feeling of security had stayed her hand. Then this cold and dank monster in a death shroud had come into their part of the train and the stranger had sprung into action. Hermione had spent those precious seconds with her fingers almost painfully buried into Crookshanks fur. She had heard a thousand voices around her and laughing. Everyone was chanting one word and another and she would have crawled under the seat cushions when there suddenly hadn't been this bright white light that pushed the creepy spirit away.

Harry had fallen unconscious, Ron was sitting in the corner of the compartment door almost as white as a ghost and Hermione had felt cold. So so cold.  
Suddenly the stranger had laid a hand on her arm and Crookshanks, who had all endured valiantly until now had scrambled from her arms with an indignant yowl. Shaggy sandy brown hair in an uneven fringe fell over kind but weary pine green eyes. There were a lot of scars on his face, the most prominent right over the bridge of his nose and one to the right side of his temple. Still, she had felt peace and quiet around her at that moment. Like all her thoughts suddenly had decided to go on holiday. He handed her a big piece of chocolate which she happily accepted. Anything to feel better again.

His eyes seemed to linger on Harry all the time, even when they had left the train for the carriage and the small girl vowed to keep an out for the strange professor that fate had seemingly dropped into their midst.  
The next direct interaction with Professor Remus J. Lupin was on the day they had their first DADA lesson in the  
third year. He looked healthier than before as if a part of a big burden had been lifted for the time being. She found it still a bit odd that his gaze always seemed to find Harry in a crowd of people but Mrs McGonagall and the headmaster would know best.  
Everyone had been surprised when the professor had entered the classroom and declared the lesson to be practical. She had caught the brief smile on the man's lips and had rolled her eyes at his antics.  
Peeves had been utterly trounced, a first for a new teacher at the school and Professor Lupin seemed to know it.  
Snape had been unpleasant as always. Hermione often got a kind of conflicted feeling from him. He always seemed to sun himself in the fear and the anger he created but underneath it all, he was just a very lonely and bitter man. Hermione didn't know what had happened to make the potions master such a recluse and a generally unpleasant person, though she felt something akin to pity for the man. She knew he utterly despised her for it.  
Professor Lupin had grinned at Snape and declared Neville to be his assistant for the lesson. Everyone had gasped at his words and the dour hawkish man in black had vanished with his ominously billowing robes. The students had filled the staff room and the girl had caught the professor quietly sniffing his pupils. For a moment she had been taken aback but then he had turned around. For a moment Hermione saw a flash of gold in his eyes before they closed and he seemed to breathe her in. There was such a look of utter peace on his face when he took a deep breath that for a second she couldn't say anything.  
What is wrong with him...?  
“Professor, are you all right?” There was confusion on his face when he looked at her again. Still, there was gold in his gaze and a sad, oh so sad smile on his lips.  
“I'm OK Miss Granger. Please go on.” His voice was warm and still a bit sad and reminded Hermione of her grandfather who lived in Suffolk.  
The rest of the lesson had been in concept enjoyable but for her, it had been a nightmare to her senses. Lavender and her friends had begun to screech like banshees at the various forms the Boggart could turn into.  
She had been shortly before a meltdown when Professor Lupin had jumped in front of Harry. It had only taken an instance for her to see the moon in the white orb surrounded by wispy white clouds floating in front of the man and her brain had gone into overdrive.  
His Boggart was the moon...the moon. He had been tired on the Hogwarts Express and there were a lot of scars prominent on his face. It had been the end of the month when school started...end of the month, the moon and scars. It was tickling her thoughts, she knew what she was seeking.  
What had been the paragraph...?  
The answer to that particular question would come to her days later.

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His first class had been an utter success. Not only had he managed to boost the fragile confidence of one of his pupils but also his own. The kids liked him and it was like balsam on a festering wound in his soul.  
Far too long he hadn't known how respect smelled or felt. He had almost twenty descriptors for disgust of contempt. His vocabulary in regards to other emotions was seriously lacking, though.

It had hurt for a moment to see James and Lily's boy looking at him with caution, but Remus knew he had burned those particular bridges personally when he had decided to crawl into a bottle so many years ago. Everyone in the class had been shocked when suddenly he had stepped between Harry and the boggart. Remus didn't exactly know why he had done it. I seemed that ingrained behaviours were still working for him. Out of the corner of his eyes he had seen Hermione Granger tossing her wild cinnamon curls around and staring at him with wide eyes.  
Neville had stepped in and everyone had laughed at Snape in a flower printed dress, effectively finishing the spirit off. Everyone except Miss Granger. She still was staring at him with intense concentration and absent-mindedly gnawed on her lower lip.  
What was so fascinating about her...? It irked him that his instincts, aka the wolf, demanded that he pay attention to her.  
As everyone was leaving she turned around in the doorway. Still, she was staring at him and suddenly he could see an idea literally bloom on her face. She was running out into the hallway the next moment like something had bitten her.  
For a moment he felt sad since the inevitable had happened and he would lose a potential friend until he realized there definitely had been no scent of fear.  
The rest of the day was spent with analysing the events and his feelings. He didn't want to become a paedophile so intensive soul-searching was in order.  
He was really disturbed when after an hour he could definitely identify the calm feeling in his chest every time he saw the girl.  
Longing...or more a form of belonging. Moony, who was already more active than he had been in years scoffed at Remus rising panic and send him the memory of his mother with him in the garden behind their cottage.  
Remus hadn't been in balance with his wolf since the night Fenrir Greyback had bitten him when he had been small so the wolf actually and actively communicating with him was a touch disturbing.  
Although, he did understand what the wolf wanted to communicate.  
They had been in balance when Hermione had touched his arm in the classroom. Not two souls in one body permanently at odds with each other but one mind and one voice. It had been something he had craved without even knowing it.  
James, Sirius and Peter had provided balance to a certain extent. They had been companions but nothing more. Padfoot had come close to understanding what the wolf wanted and needed but it hadn't been enough. The fact was that he and Moony were in perfect accord when the girl was near him.

Which raised an entirely new slew of different questions.  
Did he know her mother? It wasn't possible that he was Hermione's father. He would have remembered such a wild mob of hair every time.  
Was she a werewolf too? Doubtful, she didn't smell like a wolf and Dumbledore would have alerted him to the possibility of pups in the school.  
Was she related to him? He wasn't sure. Moony indicated that she smelled familiar but the muggle relatives of his mother had died early in the Great War. There were a few similarities between them but at the same time, Remus had the feeling that he wasn't getting something right. He just knew she was important and worthy of protection.  
In the next days, he discreetly began to observe Harry and his female friend. After all, one should know what his charges were up to in order to protect them.

Harry, he learned, much like his father James had a long-standing feud with Snape going on. Though this time the animosity had been started by Severus. Remus couldn't fault the dark-haired professor for that. The boy looked entirely too much like his father and James, together with the Marauders had been absolutely atrocious to him.  
Harry wasn't very attentive in his studies so far if Remus interpreted the times he saw him running around with Ron Weasley. Both boys had a serious lack of common sense in some situations. Ron was an average schoolboy so far but judging by the way he interacted with Hermione he could hold a grudge like nobodies business.  
Hermione herself was flitting from class to class as the days went by. Her book bag was shortly before a breakdown and the dark circles under her eyes were, at least to Remus, darkening by the minute. Even Madame Pomfrey had stated her concern when she had gotten a look at Miss Granger during lunch break. Minerva had taken a long hard look at her cub and had promised to talk to the girl. Remus was even more concerned when one week later he almost could smell the exhaustion rolling off of her.

**13th October 1993**

He found her in one of the seldom used shortcuts on his way to his second-year class. He was pressed into one of the archways, hidden behind one of the house flags and was bawling her eyes out. There were still roughly two weeks to the next full moon and his nose was gradually becoming stronger. She smelled strongly of an assortment of herbs and various strong and foul scented substances splashed on her robe. Remus' heart went out to the small girl who obviously had just come from a lesson with Snape. He had learned very early that Snape had a few “special” students he hated like Devil Snare the light. Hermione, together with Harry and Neville was one of them. As soon as she had spotted him she tried to put a brave front. Still, quiet sniffles wrecked her small frame and she really couldn't stop the fat tears sliding down her cheeks.  
Remus was at a loss. His time with the Marauders had thought him how to woe or agitate a witch but not really how to calm one down. He hunkered down on the small stairs next to her and looked into Hermione's eyes. She must have been crying for some time since her eyes were bloodshot and her nose bright red. The werewolf slowly raised a hand to lay it on her shoulder. If she wanted she could go away any time.  
Just as he wanted to ask her what had happened she flung herself at his chest and he suddenly had his lap full of crying girl. It was like the storm had broken over him and more violent sobs shock Hermione anew.  
After a few minutes her shivers subsided and for a few blessed moments, he thought she had fallen asleep.  
Thanks to his infliction he probably would never know how it would be to have a few children of his own. But right now with a small girl crying and sniffling on his shoulder he had a few precious moments of a dream.  
Sleepy brown eyes, still slightly red from crying looked up at him and slowly he could see the mortification set in. In a flash, she was off his lap and desperately tried  
to stuff the many books that had spilt into the corner of the archway back into her book bag.  
“Prof...Professor Lupin...I'm ...”  
“There's no need for excuses, Miss Granger..” he stopped her apologies with his hand held up. “I don't want to know what happened. You don't have to explain anything. I know that school sometimes gets to you... All I ask of you is if you've got any problems or need someone to talk, my door is always open.”  
She stared at him for a few seconds and Remus felt anger again at the look of utter astonishment the girl presented him. Did they leave the students alone with their problems nowadays? He definitively needed to talk to Minerva. With a flourish, he produced a chequered handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to her. Still somewhat flabbergasted she took it and held it in her hand.  
“I believe you don't want to miss your next class, Miss Granger?”  
Startled and with a small squeak Hermione whirled around and began to turn towards the classrooms for Arithmancy before she remembered the piece of cloth in her hands. Remus just smiled.  
“Please just keep it.” he waved her off. “I have a lot more of them. Just remember I'm always available to talk.” A shy smile was his reward and the little witch turned around the corner with a nod.  
Remus couldn't really describe how he felt. Calm, at the same time giddy with nerves and delighted beyond measure. The wolf did send him the urge to roll on the ground in glee but the young professor resisted with the last remnants of his dignity.

For a flash, while sitting in the lonely archway, he thought that to others he must have looked odd. Panic started to rise that a lot of people who wished him ill. And there were a lot of them, would defame him as a lecherous old man when they would have seen that.  
Pain bloomed in his head as he got the first real and tangible impression of the beast residing in part of his soul. The wolf was snarling and slavering as he hammered his thoughts in Remus's consciousness.  
“WE are Moony! She's important... Pups are always important! Treasure...protect pups! Protect the pack!!”  
The human couldn't really make heads or tail about this statements but he knew the understanding would come in time. At the end of the day, he wondered which pack Moony had meant, though.  
His pack had been broken by lies and deceit and since one important member was dead and the other one had gone to prison and probably insane by now, he had no possibility to build it new again. And yet Moony was communicating clearly with him again, something he hadn't done for years and had claimed that small slip of a girl as a member. Maybe the next full moon would bring both of them a moment of clarity. Another welcomed side effect of the Wolfsbane Potion. Remus could reflect on the wolf's impressions and promptings with the beast conscious and willing to elaborate. With that resolve, he went to bed after grading the first essays from the second year in the evening.  
The next day he found a piece of chocolate next to the papers in the DADA classroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.....  
> This chapter was damn hard to write...I needed quite a few minutes for editing and deleted whole passages a few times.  
> Originally I wanted to keep it longer but this end was the most convinient in the end.  
> I hope you stay tuned.  
> Also thanks to the person who mentioned the grammar check programm ^^


	4. All Souls Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The disaster of the Halloween Quidditch Match and Remus first full moon on school grounds.  
> Some could say that would be quite enough but someone throws a wrench into things...

_Standing on the bridge that crosses_  
The river that goes out to sea  
The wind is full of a thousand voices  
They pass by the bridge and me  
  
I can see the lights in the distance  
Trembling in the dark cloak of night  
Candles and lanterns are dancing,  
dancing,  
A waltz on All Souls Night  
All Souls Night  
Loreena McKennitt  
  
  
**Night of 30th to 31rst October 1993, Full Moon  
**  
The weeks went by in a blur of lessons and then the end of the month blasted Remus with all the accustomed aches and wariness which came with being older and a werewolf.  
It was like Moony tried to compensate for all the years in hiding and being ignored by his human and on the days towards the full moon, he tried to wear Remus down.  
  
Here, in Hogwarts, both wolf and human had known a bit of freedom and tranquillity that had belied the years to come. Still, although peace and freedom seemed to flee from him in the last years, Remus wouldn't have changed it one bit.  
  
Now they were back at his childhood haunts and the wolf was past elated. Remus was still reluctant to use the old nickname when talking to the beast, but strangely Moony didn't seem to mind.  
While there had been a lot of self-mutilation and self-deprecating when he had been younger, now Moony simply shrugged none existent shoulders and accepted his objections.  
  
The wolf was energized by the old and new scents of the castle but the human in comparison felt melancholic and a bone-deep tiredness that complicated his duties in the last days of the month. Only after a direct threat from Madame Pomfrey, who even told him that she had prepared his usual bed for him, he acquiesced to spend the day before and after the full moon resting.  
  
  
In the evening, after he had taken his last dose of the dreadful Wolfsbane Potion out of the hands of an even more sour-faced Severus Snape, he tried to slink out of the castle unseen as usual.  
Most of the staff knew about his condition but old habits were hard to shake.  
  
Moony's sharp nose rescued him from a difficult situation in the last second. The wolf had identified the scent from metres away. He had reached the hidden passage to the edge of the school grounds and at the wolfs' prodding he turned around.  
  
Miss Granger, apparently had been following since he had passed the library a few minutes ago. The wolf, unusually close to the surface these days only scoffed at the odd formality in his thoughts.  
He could smell the aroma of cured leather, parchment, paper dust and ink among her usual fresh scent of rain. She had been as silent as her already infamous ginger cat. If Moony hadn't pointed her out in the hallway before, Remus surely would have given away his secret.  
  
Now he stood in the already dark corridor, his wand lit at high capacity and delivered a very pointed stare to the place where he knew she'd been hiding. After a few minutes, she shuffled out from behind the archway which led back to the Great Hall, fidgeting and with a slight dusting of pink on her cheeks. She hadn't thought he would catch on.  
  
“Miss Granger? I hope you have a good explanation for being out so late. I would be very disappointed to have to detract points.”

  
Inwardly he cringed at how cool and detached way his voice sounded.  
_Blimey...I sound like Severus!_  
  
The girl looked away from him, at an abandoned frame next to the door and radiated acute embarrassment.  
“Did you mean it?”  
  
Her quiet voice, devoid of the usual bossiness, sounded small in the silent castle and for a moment the teacher was taken aback by the sudden counter question.  
  
“I'm sorry?”  
  
She shook her head and tried to hide her now flaming face behind a curtain of wild dark curls. Again Remus felt reminded of someone. Someone half-forgotten in the years gone by.  
  
“Miss Granger...”  
“I wanted to say thank you... You notice a lot when no one else seems to see a thing...”  
There was a hint of bitterness in the young voice and he could see a sad half-smile forming on her face.

  
“But you did! You did notice. I guess you saw it the very first day on the train.”

  
Now the girl raised her chin and tried to look strong, though Remus had to suppress a smile. At this moment she reminded him of a slightly bigger despondent kitten. He remained silent.  
  
“Well, I noticed that you weren't really sleeping that day and apparently you know Harry from before...Personally, I mean...and you're very kind...”  
  
Remus could observe the strawberry colour of embarrassment rising on her face during her little halting speech and soon it covered her entire face.  
He stepped away from the wall and took two or three steps towards the now wildly rambling girl. The courage from a few moments ago had left her completely and she was staring at the tiled stone while her fingers scrambled for purchase in the hem of her unruly locks.  
Just as he wanted to lay a reassuring hand on her shoulder she raised her head. For seconds wide brown eyes, almost amber in the low yellow light of his wand, stared at him. Moony perked up and begun pacing in his head. Remus felt a surge of hardly discernible feelings rush over him. Something clattered to the floor between them and as Remus lowered his gaze towards the object on the floor, the girl fled.  
He still could hear the clatter of her Mary Jane’s when she had rounded the corner towards Gryffindor Tower, but he was far to busy to stare at the chocolate bar before his feet. Salted Caramel with dark chocolate. How had she guessed his favourite candy?  
  
  
  
  
**31rst October, Halloween  
**  
The next day found Remus with the glaring bright light of early autumn morning outside on the school grounds. Lances of light were drilling holes in is already hurting head when he left the tunnel beneath the Whomping Willow. He felt exhausted after subduing the ornery tree and taking maybe five steps towards the castle.  
  
The potion had worked and for once he hadn't found himself bleeding profoundly all over a completely trashed room. Instead, he had had the first real conversation with Moony in years.  
It was hard to explain and the best way to describe it would be calling it a very vivid daydream. Moony rarely used words. Mostly images or certain memories strung together to express his meaning and Remus had to think back to Lily who had, one day voiced the opinion that the werewolf curse could actually be a sort of magical schizophrenia. It certainly felt like it at times.  
  
Moony still insisted about something strange compelling him to look out for Hermione and Remus and his beast had spent most of the night pacing in the Shack voicing their theories to each other.  
The wolf was certain there had been a werewolf in her family and had ignored all information regarding her Muggle-born status. After all, muggles could also get infected. Lastly, they had concluded that for whatever reason they both liked the bushy-haired girl and felt protective of her.  
The wolf had gone through several mental scenarios with her being and Harry in danger and even Remus had been astounded at his rage while seeing those images. In the end, they both had gotten more questions than answers.  
  
His only explanation for all this so far was that the little girl reminded him strongly of Lily. Though, while his red-haired friend had been just as intelligent and certainly had known how to boss them all around, she never had struggled with the concept of finding friends like Hermione did.  
In his lessons, he had seen how her intelligence had set her apart from her peers and often he saw a glimmer of loneliness in her brown eyes.  
Sure she had Harry and Ron but Remus wouldn't have picked Harry as the best example for a best friend. Due to his fame as the Boy-who-Lived he was even more elevated than her and Remus still, even after weeks, could smell the stink of slight abuse on the boy. Still, maybe both could be good for each other. Merlin knew the boy needed a good friend.  
Ron wasn't very considerate and often quite rude in his dealing with other and showed a casual cruelness in his dealings with Hermione that made Remus wonder what had gone wrong in Molly's education of her family.  
It seemed that, what had endeared her to him, her intelligence, her literacy and her shy pride in her accomplishments, as well as her literacy, weren't qualities to be liked in this years.  
Suddenly, despite only being thirty-four years old he felt absolutely ancient. It was probably meant to be universally ironic when his knees almost gave way at the end of the secret passage in Hogwarts.  
  
  
Poppy Pomfrey was nervously puttering around in her small office when he Remus arrived in the Hospital Wing. She gave the young teacher a tight smile and manoeuvred him to a cot in the far back of the room. An assortment of different potions was placed on his bedside table and it was exactly the same plethora of bottles he had gotten every year when he still had been a student.  
One for the pain and muscle aches, bruise paste, one for his hurting and inflamed scars and a Pepper-Up when he would be awake again.  
He tried to get comfortable on the bed and it hit him like a hammer.  
  
Normally after moving to new surroundings, even if he'd already been there before, Moony had always been agitated to the extreme. To the contrary, his stay in his hiding place had been almost tranquil and quiet and Moony had been the one to start communicating. The wolf had done that only once before. The night Sirius had gotten the brilliant idea of leading Severus Snape to an almost certain doom only to be rescued by James. Back then the talking had been far from civil. Even days after the event Moony often had tried to seize control from his human and make true on his threat of disciplining the dog animagus.  
Yesterday was actually the first full moon with the Wolfsbane. Moony still had been ferocious and wild but had been willing to provide his human with more information. As cryptic as the titbits from the beast had been. Remus had mulled over his words during his walk to the Hospital Wing and had summoned parchment, quill and ink to write.  
  
_Run with the wolves_  
to become part of the pride.  
Your shadow by day  
becomes you by the night.  
Flee not from innocence  
the times will to pass,  
you must run with the wolves  
for this time to last  
  
The words, written in a shaky hand glared at him ominously from the paper. Moony always was a cryptic but it was a surprise that the old wolf had been a poet all this time. Remus had the distinct impression of someone scoffing at him from somewhere and unbidden the memory of a girl from Ravenclaw entered his head.  
  
Melissa Thorpe had been in sixth year when he himself had been in fifth and she had broken his heart on a bet. When he tried to get an explanation and an apology from her she just had laughed in his face and had said:  
**“Seems like you don't know me as well as you thought, eh Lupin?”**  
It had been the first night he had drank together with Sirius and both had gotten completely sloshed to the disappointment of Minerva McGonagall.  
  
The poem was Moony's usual style. He had found he enjoyed the use of words to confuse his human. Remus wasn't really sure what it should mean regarding Hermione Granger but he had all year to decipher this riddle. He stretched his weary limbs on the short bed and let a leaden dreamless sleep take him.

 

 

**31rst October, Quidditch Pitch**

  
Padfoot woke up drenched by cold rain and with a feeling of quiet dread rolling in his stomach. He saw people swarming towards the Quidditch Pitch and quickly tried to hide beneath the ranks. He couldn't have been unconscious for more of two minutes.  
Nobody did pay attention to him. Then he caught a glimpse of the Headmaster amongst the sea of students. Dumbledore was standing next to the black-robed Severus Snape and began levitating the pup from the pitch.  
Harry wasn't moving.  
  
One gaze towards the ranks would have been enough to discover something quite out of place. Tiny blasts of lightning were chasing down the flags and illuminated the wooden structure underneath. Glowing red eyes stared after the procession of students and teachers and only after they had vanished around the bend on the path to Hogwarts, Padfoot loosened his jaw around his right front paw. It had needed all his willpower to stay where he was while his instincts practically screamed at him to run after the boy. He just had to hold up hope that Harry was going to be all right.  
  
There was a cave near the Black Lake he had visited once with Lion to search for lost passages to the school. He would hole up there for the next days and keep watch. The rat was going to make his move soon. Peter was a creature of habit and then Padfoot would be there to rain divine retribution on him. He would wait for news and plan....it wasn't like he hadn't learned to be good at it after all the years in Azkaban.

 

**31\. October, Hospital Wing**

  
When he woke up it was getting dark outside. Poppy Pomfrey was standing in front of the big bay window at the end of the hall and stared out towards the darkening stormy sky. Remus wasn't sure how late it was already but he could hear the muted thumping of fat raindrops on glass. The healer looked up in his direction and wrung her delicate hands a worried expression etched on her face.  
  
“ I hope they are being careful. The weather is only getting worse any minute and Quidditch injuries are a nasty enough business.”  
  
Remus tried to sit up for a drink of water on his nightstand but a sharp pain in his left arm prevented it. With a groan, he sank back into the cushions.  
_Quidditch...Right, today is the match against Slytherin. Then it must be afternoon._  
A bitter smile bloomed on his scarred face. Another promise he hadn't kept for James.  
_I wonder if he's as good on a broom as James. He's going to be magnificent..._  
Again he dozed off and his dreams were filled with brooms and Sirius and James laughing in the distance.  
  
  
He woke again to screaming and screeching and a strange high pitched whining that was hurting his ears. After setting his confusion aside he noticed Minerva and Poppy arguing in front of the nurses' small office. Arguing was putting it mildly. It looked more like it could turn into a brawl every minute. Either way, both witches were locked up in a full-blown screaming match.  
  
“You should do something!!”  
“Don't tell me how to do my job, Minerva! I'm ..”  
“For the love of Merlin, it was bad enough watching it!!”  
“I did what I can. Severus and I already poured so many potions into the poor boy when he arrived...”  
“Severus! Severus is a potion master, not a damn medic. He doesn't know a thing about....”  
“Minerva!!”  
  
The werewolf winced when the screaming picked up in volume after that. Obviously, like Poppy had predicted, there had been an accident, a severe one by the looks of it. That pesky whine was still buzzing in his ears like one of those persistent muggle clocks his mother had kept in his bedroom. He turned his head to locate the source of that awful sound when the fragrance of baked cookies and petrichor assaulted his still sensitive nose.  
Oh no....!  
  
Three beds away from him, the blanket almost pulled to his chin and as pale as death, lay James' son. The whine came from the girl beside the bed.  
Hermione Granger probably had sneaked in when Poppy and Minerva has started their scream-fest in front of the office. Her hand shakily petted the side of Harry's face while she herself seemed to sway on the spot as if she was drunk. Her hair was even wilder than ever and Remus had to look twice to confirm that it was really waving and writhing in an invisible wind. Small sparks sprang from one lock to the next and with a small groan he launched himself from the bed. This is going to become ugly...  
  
He arrived at the girl's side just as her head begun to glow in an eerie blue-green light. Still, she was uttering that high buzzing whine and in a last desperate measure, the man flung his arms around the now wildly shivering girl.  
And got zapped for his trouble.  
  
Once he had touched an electric cow fence near Potter's Field on a dare from Sirius. Right at the moment it felt similar but didn't hurt as much. The electric energy had burned his hand and the burn had hurt for days after touching the fence.  
The current that ran through him now felt like being doused with hot water right before jumping into a glacial lake in frigid winter. Moony howled and Remus didn't have enough strength left to fight his instincts. His howl rang in the hall and the anguish bound in it was like an actual living thing in the room, prowling in front of the window. For anguish was the emotion that was carried along the magic energy washing over his magic in a tight wave. Inconsolable anguish.  
  
As his voice tapered off he registered the utter silence in the room as well as the fact that the girl in his arms had become as stiff as a board. Suddenly scrabbling fingers clawed at his arms, an almost feral growl spilling from the girl's throat, choked with wet gasps. Poppy Pomfrey sprinted over to them with outstretched hands and yelled at the top of her rather impressive lungs.  
  
“Mr Lupin! Let go of her immediately!”  
His response was instant and instinctual.  
**NO!!**  
  
The deep roar stopped the approaching nurse dead in her tracks and she recoiled from the man like he had slapped her. It still rang in his ears when small hands grabbed, no seized the lapels of his shirt and the now violently crying girl had her head slammed on his shoulder. Clumsily, like back in the archway days ago, Remus began to pat Hermione's head. He began to whisper the same words his mother had used when he had been trapped in the terrors of a nightmare. Gradually the tremors and sniffles, as well as the sharp scent of fear and agony, vanished and again Remus noticed that Hermione had fallen asleep again in mere seconds.  
I've never seen someone fall asleep so quickly...Is she sick?  
  
She was wide awake again the moment Poppy touched her shoulder. He could feel the slight flinch from the girl and frowned. What is wrong with her?  
  
“Miss Granger, I'm going to administer a Calming Draught.” the healer's voice rang in the sudden silence and Hermione's eyes went wide as galleons when she uttered a quiet but decisive  
“No!”  
“Miss Granger! You had a major magical incident just this moment. I must think about my other patients and your co...”  
“NO!”  
“Miss Granger!”  
  
Poppy almost roared at the now quiet girl in Remus lap when Minerva laid a gentle but firm hand on her shoulder.  
“Poppy, I think it would be best to leave it be for now. Miss Granger is in no immediate danger and the situation seems to be under control.”  
  
Her voice was utterly calm, a definite contrast to the almost shrieking she had done just five minutes ago. The teacher was staring hard at Hermione, a gleam of something like recognition in her eyes.  
  
_**“Tha thu ceart, mo nighean? “**_  
Hermione stared at her head of house in puzzlement for a few seconds. Then words fell from her lips that astounded Remus to no end.  
_**“ Tha mi gu math, taing duth.”**_  
  
It was strange to hear the strange but still familiar Gaelic words being formed by Hermione's tongue. Oddly, Minerva's face went slack in shock for a second and then it cycled through a fast gamut of different emotions. Smugness, pride, then a sort of revelation and on the forefront after that anger...so much anger the wolf and the human wouldn't have been surprised to see a spitting and hissing cat jumping on the floor in the next minute. The woman had remarkable control and although Remus could feel the tremors of absolute fury in Minerva's hand, she patted the girl's hair and stalked out of the Hospital Wing. He still could hear the hissing of very creative Gaelic curses even after the doors had closed.  
  
Now he sat right next to an unconscious boy with a girl in

his lap and he saw the mortification set on her features. In a flash she was on the other side of the bed, a brilliant blush running rampant on her face.  
Remus just smiled kindly and said:  
“ My offer still stands, Miss Granger. If you need to talk I'll be there.”  
He didn't hear her answer when right at that moment Harry's Quidditch mates poured into the room, trailed by one pale Ron Weasley.  
  
The rest of the evening was hectic chaos around Harry's bed. The young boy, much like his father, had quite a thing for dramatic actions. Right now it hurt to look at him when everything he did was shadowed by the same actions of James after his first Quidditch accident in fourth year. Remus winced when he turned around on the bed and renewed the Notice-me-not charm he had cast on himself when everyone had filed into the room.  
  
The youngest Weasley had been as white as milk when he had sat down next to Harry's bedside. Half an hour later the boy had woken up and right before curfew his two friends had left the Wing towards their beds in Gryffindor Tower. Hermione had sent a long gaze into is general direction before she had closed the doors behind her.  
  
He had all night to ponder the events of the day since his impromptu naps after the full moon often messed up his sleep cycle. It was one of the many reasons he always looked so tired. Hermione's reactions to Harry's injury puzzled him. She had seemed to be more than distraught...almost like he had died.  
Looking back, he realized that even before the match she had been jittery and high strung in class. She often had looked as tired as Remus felt and often he didn't even saw her leaving the classroom only to find her already outside in the hall. She was hiding something.  
Minerva had been even stranger. Her reaction had told him she hadn't known that Miss Granger could speak Gaelic and she hadn't returned to the wing in the evening. Why had she been so angry?  
It led him back to the events before Minerva had marched out and Remus shuddered as he recalled the feel of the blue light washing over him. Moony nudged his thoughts and Remus gasped.  
  
**You've felt his before, remember?**  
_No...Oh shit! NO!_  
  
It hadn't been accidental magic.  
Harry was fast asleep when Remus retrieved his wand with shaking fingers from under his pillow.  
His hand performed a tight twirl with a flourished wave at the end and he heard himself whisper: “Est vinculum Revelar.” as he watched the light pouring of his wand.  
  
A small supernova of blue light exploded behind the canvas Madame Pomfrey had erected to protect his privacy. For a moment the light expanded and the collapsed in itself at the point of his wand.  
“Oh, shit...”  
A small beam of brilliant blue light vanished behind the doors in the direction of the tower.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So finally, here is chapter 4. I tried to work with some tips I've got from some reviewer. I hope it's better to read now.  
> Have fun.


	5. Meeting the beast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus tries a talk with Moony and Hermione begins to suffer strange symptons...meanwhile  
> Sirius is planning havoc with a purchase in Hogsmeade.

  
The beast to the beast is calling  
They rush through the twilight sweet,  
But the soul is a wary hunter,  
He will not let them meet.  
                   _Vox Corporis Sara Teasdale_

 

  
**4th November 1993**

It took several days of waiting until Sirius saw his  
small feline friend again. The cat was hissing and spitting at him the moment he had set a paw into the wizards hideout at the Lake. Lion was seriously angry at something or someone and the penny dropped when the cat let out a pained yowl when he looked towards the Quidditch Pitch.

"This is about Harry, right?"

In his own "four walls" Sirius felt secure enough for not walking around in his Grim form and he had given up feeling strange for talking to a cat. Lion always gave clear signs of being able to understand him perfectly well. In the weeks that followed their initial meeting in the castle he almost had forgotten his new one and only friend was a cat.

The Kneazle puffed up his mane looking a lot haughtier than before and made a subtle sign on the sand with his paw. Sirius had been an animagus long enough to recognize the universal sign used by all familiars. Lion was talking about his human.

The scraggly wizard remembered seeing the fluffy cat in the arms of a tiny girl with the biggest and wildest mass of dark brown curls on her head he'd ever seen. If her hair had been black he'd have asked if his cousin had gotten herself another daughter. He wasn't sure how much time had passed exactly, long time exposure to Dementors could do that, but he was sure that he'd have heard if Andromeda would have gotten another kid and Nymphadora was far too young to have a kid of her own.

The Kneazle was distressed and angry and Sirius realized that what happened on the Pitch must have had given everyone a fright. The cat's mistress was a friend of Harry and was only logical that the little girl had been shocked  
Lion mimed again with his body, hairs on his back standing in all directions and tail lashing in fright. Not only shocked, no utterly terrified and the cat had tried to console her for the last few days. He waved his paws and pointed at the sky while letting out a long yowl that eerily reminded Sirius about his old friend residing in the castle now.

Something about Remus...and blue??

Lion chuffed at him, obviously annoyed at the wizard for not catching on and mimed the cat sign for a broom. He jumped in the air and began to hold a mock battle with the air around him before he pointed his whole body at the Whomping Willow that was visible from the entrance of the cave.-

A broom?! ...Harry's broom? Harry's broom flew into the Willow? What happened with it?

The cat performed an impressive imitation of a dog playing dead. Harry's broom had been destroyed. Sirius thoughts raced around in his head.

Harry was on the Team...and the Team wouldn't be playing without a Seeker. He had recognized the position immediately upon watching the game and still he felt immensely proud of the pup. A Seeker without a broom. Gryffindor wouldn't be playing for the House Cup. Slowly a plan began to form and in the end, a fluffy ginger cat left the small cave on the east side of the Black Lake with a formal letter and a small pouch of Galleons in his snout.

 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

Remus was facing a predicament of epic proportions. After the full moon right before Halloween, he shouldn't have been surprised that Severus had been trying to sabotage his job as a teacher.  
He hoped nobody had seen him flinch when half the class had shouted the subject Severus had chosen, at him. His hearing was still sensitive as well as his sense of smell and the anger and righteousness stirring in the room had been getting to him.

**Werewolves...Seems like old Snape is out to get us exposed.**

The volume hadn't really decreased after he had asked if they had informed the Potions Master that this subject hadn't been covered yet.  
A whole essay on Werewolves. He had ordered himself to smile and had cancelled Snape's assignment. A flash of blue on the side had caught his eye and for a moment he had stared at Hermione while she had stated despondently her essay to be already finished.

The talk with Harry at the end of the lesson had been difficult. That the boy had lost his broom was unfortunate but Remus was glad Harry was still alive. In fact, Harry had been the one to direct the talk towards the Dementors. Remus had gotten an update regarding the match in the evening by Poppy while she had administered the last of his Pepper-Up Potion to him.

He was appalled when Harry told him what exactly he heard when one of those foul creatures had been near him. It was a special kind of torture to hear the death of your parents over and over again.  
The Werewolf had been tempted to blurt out all those stories about James he had kept close to his heart, but in the end, Harry beat him to it when he asked why the Wardens of Azkaban had come to the match.  
Remus barely had held himself back then. Moony had seen the quiet despair and had smelled the grief. The wolf was furious when his human side prevented then from comforting the pup...again!

 **You're an idiot and it will bite you in the ass when everything comes to light...**  
_Maybe...but in the end, it is going to be better for him if I keep my distance._  
**Mark my words....and remember what I told you before. You're an absolute idiot but he needs you...**

Remus had ignored the growling gravelly voice in his head and in the end he had promised Harry to give him special defence lessons.  
Which brought him back to the moment and a tiny blue glowing girl standing in front of his open office.

 **They can't see it, you know.**  
_What?_  
Moony's smirk was like an actual feeling in his head. The wolf's thoughts were brimming with smugness.  
**The glow, Remus. I guess you don't really know what it means...?**

It was like being drenched with ice-water on a hot summer day. Remus gave the girl a tight smile and stalked away from the office as fast as he could without running, intent on finding something to break his fingers upon.

_What. Did.You.Do !?_

The halls went by in a blur and soon he found himself near the greenhouses right next to a few of Professor Sprouts prized apple trees.

 **Me...I didn't do anything. How do you guess Fenrir always knew where his pups were ...hmm?**  
Remus sputtered.  
_She's ...She's not_ …!  
In a flash, his hand slapped the rough bark of a nearby tree and the man hissed at the feeling of torn skin scraping away.  
**Relax.**  
Moony crooned soothingly in his head. It was such an odd feeling that Remus stopped pummelling the tree and began to dry heave.  
Thankfully nobody was around watching him.

 **Relax. She's a pup, but not your pup, for moon's sake! I should know....I'd definitely would have remembered shagging someone looking like her. I guess she's got the looks from her mum...**  
_Get. To the point!_  
**You know, that's exactly why I usually don't bother talking with you. It's always the same reaction. Ooh...I must be going mad or ...the big bad wolf is just out to hurt someone. Oh, woe is me!**

Shocked Remus sat down at the foot of the oldest of the apple trees. Moony seemed to have taken control as soon as he had stopped hitting the bark and human seethed in quiet resentment, forced to listen.  
**Look, bach blaidd. She's got the wyld in her heart. I can smell it and you can see it. There's no denying it. We only see her in your lessons but even you should have noticed that she keeps a tight lid on her magic.**  
Remus had to agree. While Hermione hadn't been the best so far, she knew a great array of spells and when she did cast successfully it packed quite a punch.-  
**She's going to be one hell of a witch when she's grown up.**  
_Yes, but what does it have to do with the glow?_

Moony sighed, long and heavy with feeling.  
**Bach blaidd, what was the first thing they taught you about magic? Especially personal magic?**

Like a shadow out of the gloom, the voice of his old Magic Theory teacher rose to his ears.

_Magic in it's purest form is intent and based on the will of the caster. The stronger the focus the stronger the results of a spell. That's why spells, where you have to be initially creative, are more difficult than a simple reactive or directive spell._

**Right, Charms are creative work, because it binds Arithmancy in totally new and imaginative ways. Transfiguration is difficult too but you have to rely on your memory to alter the form of something. Creative Transfiguration relies on the creative memory of the caster and is always limited to the materials and what you want to do with it.**

The young man could only gape at the slew of information thrown his way.  
_I didn't know you knew magic so well..._  
**Why? I'm. ..We're a magical creature. We should know about this and honestly, I find the lack of your education in this regard alarming and disgusting!**

Remus tried to hit his head against the rough bark of the tree behind her but was thwarted by Moony's iron control over his muscles. It was worrying to feel it.

**This isn't the first time I have talked to you like this, bach blaidd. I used to talk to you often when you were little and still fresh...until the hatred and the bigotry separated us...**

He snorted. Apparently, as long as he wasn't hurting himself he was free to do anything he wished. It felt strange trusting the beast, though Remus hadn't thought the wolf be capable of rational thought.

**I said it back then and I say it again. You...WE are not evil!! You didn't believe me when I talked it first up but remember that history is written by the victors.**

Some of the students running to herbology class gave him pointed stares as they entered the Green House. He probably was a sight to behold sitting here underneath the trees and talking with himself.  
The years had taught Remus a lot. Especially the time alone with nothing but that gravelly voice inside his head. Still, he couldn't help but argue with the beast inside him, although he knew that Moony always would stay.

 **I know you tried to ignore me...after Lyall...and I let you. Grief is a powerful emotion and our life was soaked with it back then. I...**  
_Don't talk to me about grief, monster!_

Pain ripped through Remus' head as soon as he had uttered the words. For a few seconds, all he could do was sit there and gasp for air as the pressure left his head and ears.

**YOU...will NOT CALL US THAT!! I'm not responsible for your insecurities...you should thank your father and the humans around you for that. And...yes, I miss them too, you know.**

He touched his face in wonder when he tasted salt at the edge of his mouth. He had come to terms with the events of the James death. With the Marauders splintered beyond repair and he sat in an orchard and still cried about his lost friends.

 **I'm just as much...you...as you are me, bach blaidd. There can't be one without the other. Your different from Greyback...as different as an elk is to a stag.**  
_You...you mean like the same family but different branches?_  
**Something like that.**

Moony's joy was almost tangible and Remus saw for a short moment what was the biggest difference between him, the human and his beast  
The wolf felt without reservation. While Remus himself knew he was a passionate man and his time in Hogwarts proved he had quite a temper sometimes, he had tried to hold himself back with the teachings and the fear of his father still fresh in his mind.

**Lyall meant well...but he didn't do you any favours with his behaviour.**

As a small boy, right after the bite, Remus had often tried to get some sort of rapport with his father, but to no avail. Lyall had been loving but distant and as Remus got older he had noticed and smelled the fear that permeated underneath their interaction. I had been hurtful and eye-opening at once. Being cursed at and belittled for circumstances he had no control over hadn't hurt as much.

**Lad, I know it's a revelation that was long overdue...but what about the girl?**

Remus couldn't help but smile...It was strangely comforting and funny how Moony appeared like an old friend in those moments. It was like James and Sirius were talking to him disguised in snark and sarcastic comments.

 _First, you bring us off topic and now I'm the one who has to be reminded about the subject?_  
**Well, what do you remember about your History of Magic classes?**  
_Not much...Binns was driving us to sleep even then._

He still could hear the old droning on about the sixth goblin rebellion in the 17th century while James snored next to him on the table. The memory was so vivid that Remus almost jumped when someone poked him in the side.  
Seems like she found you, lad.

Hermione Granger stood right next to him a slightly worried expression on her strawberry red face. Her curls danced in the small breeze that had started and the blue light flowed around her like a halo. Remus was surprised he felt so at peace when he felt her small hand on his shoulder.

"Are you all right Professor Lupin? The ground is rather cold..."

She was so near to him that he could see the dark bag under her eyes and the exhausted hunch to her posture. For a moment he was alarmed when he saw the gold creeping into her gaze. Like someone slowly was pouring gold into her eyes the longer she looked at him. Remus heard himself gasp when he felt that electric fire washing over him again from her touch.

What the hell is going on?

He tried to school his features into a smile and felt like he had failed horribly when he saw her eyebrows slant down in worry and confusion.  
"I'm all right Miss Granger. I wanted to return to the castle just now."  
From far away in he heard the small howl of Moony's disappointment. She still hadn't let go of his arm, her concern written on her face clear as day.

"I wanted to ask if you would be so kind to grade my essay regardless of what you said in class. It's just...I'm already finished and …."  
"I would be glad to see what you have written. Though I guess it isn't the only reason you tried to seek me out, right?"

She shifted from side to side. Still, the flashes of electric were running through him and Moony whined. Remus tried violently to suppress it. Within seconds colour rose on her face and she looked away.  
Had she heard him?  
"I..." She turned to him again and looked him directly in the eyes. Blue flashes rose around her again and for a second the werewolf felt like some big beast brushing up next to him. Moony was oddly quiet but Remus himself felt anxious … or exited. It was all so confusing and overwhelming that he barely caught the end of Hermione's sentence.

"...what happened on Halloween."

His confusion must have shown on his face since she looked at him oddly.  
"I wanted to say thank you and apologize. Madam Pomfrey informed me that I had a bout of accidental magic because of what happened to Harry. So I'm sorry if I hurt you..."

It sounded practised and rehearsed but his senses, at the moment in overdrive, told him she was sincere. He had seen how she had been treated by class- and school-mates and how she treated them in return in class. She wasn't the best with other people, always too bossy and too haughty in response to her nervousness he could smell on her at the moment. He reminded him of an early Lily in this moments and a sad smile rose unbidden on his face.

"You didn't harm me, Miss Granger. It was mostly a lot of light and your hair acting up."  
She grinned at him still red as an apple and bit her lip.

 **Merlin, she's going to be the death of someone when she's older...**  
_Shut up you old dog!_

"I have Ancient Runes next. I'll come by the office after the class to give you the essay. Thank you, Professor. "

Another brilliant grin was flashed into his direction and in the blink of an eye, she was gone.

 

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The days after Halloween went past Hermione in a haze of confusion. She couldn't exactly recall what had happened after she had sneaked past Madame Pomfrey to check on Harry.  
Everything was kind of foggy and Hermione was sure she had lost control in shock.

The only thing in stark clarity in her memories was Harry's white face above an almost equally white cushion and the dreadful thought that she had lost her only true and best friend. She vaguely recalled Professor Lupin in one of the beds but everything past that was rather foggy, though she felt secure and warm after a severe bout of forlornness.  
Something definitely had happened but she was afraid to ask.

She had tried to talk to Lupin after eating or their classes but every time she plucked up her courage something happened to divert her. Draco Malfoy getting into a shouting match with Ron again, something asking for help with their homework or the impending trial for the Hippogriff Buckbeak. Also, she hadn't slept very well if not at all the last three days and no amount of the turning the device the Deputy Headmistress had given her could make it right. She just felt even more exhausted and had developed a powerful migraine.

Strangely her headache always lessened somewhat when she was near Professor Lupin. Maybe it was the calm he seemed to leak to everyone around him. Even Neville had stopped fidgeting in his class. Though, since their last meeting in the dark corridors, for all his promises to be available to talk Lupin seemed to avoid her every time she'd gotten a glimpse of him.

Today, she had gathered all willpower and courage and marched straight to his office after Lunch. She still had saved a bit of time before she had to go to Ancient Runes with the time turner and almost her nerves would have gotten the better of her.  
He had opened the door, probably to get to his next class when his green eyes had fallen on her. The look of horror and abject fear which crossed his features there for a second hurt like a knife stabbing her in the gut. In the next moment with a tight smile hastily plastered on his face, he had turned the proverbial tail and vanished down the hall.

She felt the tell-tale pinpricks of tears behind her eyelids but refused to give in. Professor Lupins' flight had brought her attention to the other teachers somewhat unsettling behaviour towards her. Professor McGonagall often seemed to stare at her during class, it was an unsettling stare like Hermione was a puzzle desperate to be solved. Professor Snape seemed unusually subdued in her presence since the weekend. He had brushed by her arm on Tuesday during Potion Class and Hermione had been sure she had dealt him flinch away from her.  
Madame Pomfrey too seemed to regard her with a wary caution every time she passed the Hospital Wing.  
Had she hurt someone when she had lost control? She wasn't sure but the thought made her sick. She had to know...and Professor Lupin was going to give her answers to quiet these troubling thoughts in her head. Even if she had to follow him all week!  
With a determined nod to herself, she raced down that Hall towards the Gardens.

She found Lupin in the small orchard behind the Green Houses which contained Professor Sprouts' prized Apple Trees. He was pulling at the grass in distress and talking...no arguing with himself? His hand was bleeding and there were petals from the always blooming trees in his hair. He hadn't expected her when she laid a cautious hand on his shoulder.

Later she had left the orchard even more confused them before. It had seemed like Lupin was avoiding her since the Hospital Wing but she had felt the subtle press into her hand when he had agreed to grade her extra work. Her hand had lingered on his arm and she thought she had seen tiny flashes between her hand and the fabric.  
Maybe she had imagined it because her head had begun to hurt again when she had left him standing underneath the trees and the pain had come back with a vengeance. As a result, she hadn't gotten any real work done and had become increasingly tetchy.  
So tetchy in fact that she had told Ron off for going on her nerves with his complaints about Crookshanks. It had led to another epic row between classes and Hermione hadn't been surprised when Harry had taken Ron's side after trying to stay out of it. It still hurt though.

She had left both boys standing in the Great Hall while she swallowed her grief. It wasn't normal for her to bite someone's head off for going on her nerves but she chalked it up to being stressed out. She was glad she hadn't hurt anyone on Halloween but for a moment she had gotten the impression that Professor Lupin was keeping something from her. Something important.

At dinner, the most peculiar thing happened. She had prepared her Pumpkin Juice and had opted for some Shepherds Pie when she was being assaulted by the smells around her. Everything had been amplified at least ten times and Hermione had tried not to retch under the sudden onslaught. She also hadn't been keen on finding out that Harry and Ron probably had been wearing the same socks for two weeks.  
As a result, she had entirely lost her appetite and was now standing in Professor Lupins office while the hunger from almost two days, thanks to a time-turner, gnawed at her insides.

 

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**She's outside, lad.**

Remus looked up from his preparations for the next day. He'd been grading the essays from the first year students and his gaze automatically went to the big brass-enforced door.  
How do you know?  
Moony only chuckled and Remus' hand shoved the papers away from him. The control the wolf had over him in the last days was disturbing but at the moment the human didn't fight it. It was far more important to find out about his little tricks.  
**Take a deep breath. She's nervous, hungry...very hungry and worrying her pretty little head off.**

Remus did as instructed and the heavy fresh scent of petrichor filled his nose. Underneath he could detect different smells like vinegar, stale bread and something like burnt horn or bones.  
You should call her in...  
Moony was strangely subdued again when Remus noticed the air getting stuffier. He knew that atmosphere. He had felt the electricity in the air on Halloween. With two quick steps, he had opened the door and suddenly felt rather anxious.  
What was wrong with Moony...or him? It almost felt like the wolf was trying to submit to the tiny girl.

She looked absolutely dreadful. Hermione obviously hadn't slept at all or not very well in the last few days. Another mystery for his brain to pick on. The dark bags under her eyes were even more prominent than before and she nervously tapped her foot on the ground.

"Miss Granger, do come in."

Blue flashed around her head like a small angry electric storm and Remus braced himself.  
**Don't be afraid...And. Don't. Show. It! Here she comes.**  
The moment the girl stepped through the door Remus had to hold his breath. For a second he thought he heard a low deep growl and again something big brushed against him.  
**You can't see it, right...Lyall really didn't do you any favours...**

Professor Lupin hadn't moved from next to the door when she handed him the parchment with the essay. He hadn't said a word after his initial greeting. Hermione regarded him thoughtfully without saying anything and turned around to the door again. He nearly choked on his thoughts.

Miss Granger, do you have any more classes today?

The girl turned around right in the door. Remus absent-mindedly noticed the nearly overflowing book bag on her shoulder.

"No Professor."  
"You look tired. Did something happen?"  
**Smooth, Mr Remus...really smooth.**

"Well..." she stepped away from the entrance and closed it again.  
"I'm not really sure, Professor. It's...Actually, I didn't sleep very well since Halloween. I really didn't hurt you?"

He was taken aback by her question. The girl had had a major magical outbreak that day which clearly had exhausted on all levels and her first worry was if she had hurt him. He mentioned for her to take a seat. Again there was a low groaning or growling in the background, but he ignored it.  
"No, Miss Granger. You really didn't hurt me. I know you're a muggle-born and I guess you never had accidental magic of that scale, right?"

 **One wonders how you ever talked a witch into your room, lad.**  
_Shut up!! She's thirteen you idiot...and she's scared of something._  
**You shut up and look at her...She's scared all right but not of you or what you think. Look real close and by the gods, Remus try to remember, or you'll have a disaster at your hands!**

His eyes went back to the small girl sitting in the big old overstuffed armchair and unconsciously scooted away from her.  
Golden eyes regarded him out of a slightly panicked face and her delicate nose flared when she took a deep breath.  
_My God !... Did she just scent the room and me?_  
**Look at her Remus, really look and for her sake remember dammit! You've seen it before!**  
_She hasn't been..._  
**No, she hasn't been bitten. We'd have smelled it the moment we met her on the train, you big lummox!**

Memories flooded his brain, memories he almost had forgotten. An enraged and half drunk James, running against the wood tiled wall in the Common Room after a Hufflepuff had asked Lily out. Peter and his strange sudden graving for grains and how he had been delighted when he had discovered that the kitchen was able to create peanut butter. Strongest were the memories of Sirius who had had to physically restrain himself not to go for the butt instead of a normal greeting. Distinct was the memory when after an argument with some Slytherin boys he desperately had tried not to pee in the corners. Remus and the others had nearly howled with laughter when they had seen him hopping towards the toilets as fast as possible.

  
Hermione herself was trying to become invisible as soon as she noticed the strange smile and the vacant expression on Lupins face. Maybe it had been a mistake to turn back at the door. Though from the various encounters she had with the quiet man he wouldn't turn her away like Professor McGonagall or ridicule like her like Professor Snape. At least she hoped that was the case.

Again the scents magnified and become stronger. It was bothering her and the headache became worse again. Fortunately, she had learned, through association, to differentiate some of them.  
There was the strong charred aroma of soot, ashes and burnt wood from the fireplace and the candles. Honey for the beeswax and the old dry scent of dust and leather hide she had almost immediately recognized as books. There was also the fresh scent of pine needles and old leaves and something that reminded her of the smell of Crookshank's fur. Instinctively she had known that smell to belong to Professor Lupin the first time she had smelled it.

Her professor who's rapidly paling face stood out in the candlelight as he almost flinched away from her. She was relieved when the teacher went over to the bookcase on the left side of the desk Maybe she had misinterpreted his move...  
He didn't look so tired any more and the haunted expression from his face was almost gone. Though, she couldn't quite decipher why he always looked panicked or sad when he looked at her since Halloween.

Some things didn't add up for sure. Harry and Ron seemed to worship the ground the older walked upon and she had no good explanation for Professor Snape's disdain regarding their DADA teacher. The longer she mulled over the puzzle the more Professor Snape's words to the essay began floating through her mind.  
Her much-vaunted brain readily provided the sentences she had written in her own hand just two days before.  
Werewolves in human form are almost indistinguishable from normal human beings. If one were to look for clues there are several prominent at display here.  
Often the werewolf sports scars, some looking they are fresh wounds after a transformation. These scars will never heal right and are often aggravated by the subject since Werewolves are known to attack themselves when there is no victim to bite. Heightened aggression, senses and sickness before the change are another point towards a werewolf. Often the afflicted will be weak for days after the transformation as the wolf tries to subdue the human through the pain.

Some of the symptoms...she would have known if she'd been bitten. It was all so familiar and staring right in her face.

  
Remus' head whipped around when he smelled the bitter salty stink of fear invading his quarters. For a moment he was confused.  
**I guess she knows...**  
The human grimaced and grabbed the book in his tighter as he returned to his desk. The girl was regarding him with wide open half golden eyes and was so silent it almost hurt. He shoved the book over the desk towards her and still she stared at him but looked slightly unfocused.  
**That doe-look doesn't suit her.**  
_Hold your tongue. We're in this because of you._  
**Look here, Remus. I ...Oh no.**

Apparently, the girl had taken his ire at Moony in the entirely wrong way. She had curled up on the lounge chair, knees tucked under her and a quiet unconscious snarl on her face. Already there were tale-tell flashes and sparks in her hair.

"Miss Granger?" Remus tried to reach her shoulder when Hermione showed no reaction to having heard him. She simply kept staring at him, her eyes following every movement of his hands. She jerked away and hissed at him with golden glowing amber eyes when he tried to lay his hand on her shoulder to calm herself.  
Immediately the werewolf retreated behind his desk.

As soon as he was behind the wooden contraption the snarl quieted on her face and she slowly uncurled from her painfully cramped position on the chair.  
"Miss Granger ?" There was still no reaction but Remus felt like the air was pressing into him and a sort of unnatural hot wind slightly ruffled his hair.

"Miss Granger? Hermione...please. I wasn't angry at you. There's no need for...," he sighed putting a hand on his eyes. "...for fearing me. I'd never hurt you."

Slowly he could see the chocolate brown bleed back into the golden amber. It was disconcerting to see since it reminded him of the moments when Moony came to the surface. The look of confusion on Hermione's face grew until she burst into tears when her eyes had returned to brown. The girl was confused as her gaze roamed over the books and his desk in an attempt to get her bearings.

"I...what...What did just happen, Professor Lupin? I didn't...I did never..."

His long fingers tapped the book in front of him on the desk and it opened at a seemingly random page.  
" I suggest after reading this book you should have a talk with Minerva. Professor McGonagall probably knows what's going on with you. You didn't hurt me and I don't hold what happened against you."  
He tried a tentative smile when he offered her a chequered and patched handkerchief.  
Hermione still was shaking in her seat but he could see her eyes light up when her gaze locked onto the title of the book.  
"I'll loan it to you for two weeks. I've got a lot of books on this and I'm willing to lend you the majority of it. The only condition I have is that you take care of yourself and try to slow down. Also, you can the books read here in my office since most of them are rather old."  
Her eyes narrowed.  
"I don't think you would harm a book, especially an old book but I don't exactly trust your classmates with them."  
Hermione brightened up and began to shift on her seat. He nudged the book towards her.

 

 

Magical Maturation  
Bonds, Maladies and Benefits  
by M. C. Hornflower

  
_...being powerful has a lot of drawbacks. While many young wizards and witched will never encounter a lot of the problems I'm laying out here in the script. I was appalled to find out about the lack of information the children encountered when being faced with unique circumstances during their journey to adulthood._

 

Hermione's fingers already had curled eagerly around the binding of the rather old and dusty book.  
"Read the book, Hermione. It's going to be quite useful and please talk to Professor McGonagall as soon as possible."  
His gaze caught on the clock on the wall left of his desk and with a gesture, he magically opened the door.

"It's getting late and Severus has patrol again tonight. You should head back to the tower. I wouldn't want you to get in trouble for just seeking my help. I assure you what you're going through is nothing dangerous, at least if you talk to your Head of House. You can come by any time you want and as long as I'm here...and not only to read. Good night."

She had her eyes on the book she was clutching tightly to her chest as she left the room. At the door, she turned around again and slowly a small but brilliant smile began to grow on her face. She pointed towards his desk and vanished around the corner.

Another Caramel-Chocolate Bar was lying there right in the spot the book had occupied before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so...it was kinda hard writing this chapter.  
> First I like to write everything out in long hand and edit then while I try to put it into the PC.  
> I hate dialoque but I guess I have to work on that.  
> Second I got my hand injured again and work is eating my brain. It is kinda hard typing with a bandaged hand. ^^
> 
> In so far I again ask if someone would be partial to try and beta my stuff for me, since English isn't my first language.  
> Write in the comments if your interested. ^^ 
> 
> Bach Bllaid = little wolf
> 
> Have fun !


	6. Hidden Maps and mishaps

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hogsmeade weekend and the Marauder's Map.  
> Harry notices the strain on his best friend.  
> Remus begins to talk to Moony in earnest and Minerva has a startling revelation.

**Chapter 6:** Hidden maps and mishaps

 

_And all my days are trances,_

_and all my nightly dreams_

_Are were your dark eye glances,_

_and where thy footstep gleams_

_In what ethereal dances,_

_by what eternal streams._

_Edgar Allen Poe_

 

**4th November, Thursday, Waning gibbous moon**

Minerva McGonagall heaved a heavy sigh as her gaze roamed over the school grounds. The orange-pink of an early Scottish morning coloured the cobblestones of the yard in peach. Four days had happened, four perfectly ordinary days and Minerva's heart was heavy with newfound memories.

Mechanically she grabbed her old gilded hairbrush, an heirloom from her mother, and began to brush the wild black locks haloing around her head. She was already at an age where you could expect a lot more grey in hair as black as hers but the gleaming curls were as black as the day she had entered the school for her first year as a teacher.

Deep in thought, her eyes strayed from her mirror image to a small black and white photography set into an old silver frame in the form of Scottish thistles. It stood on the cupboard next to her vanity and the burnished metal gleamed in the early light.

A small girl, not older than maybe six or seven years, was clutching a large black and fluffy cat to her chest. She wore a white kirtle over a dark dress like children had worn back at the middle of the last century. Next to her stood the really impressive sight of an old man with a full perfectly white long beard, it nearly reached his chest, in full Highland garb.

For a moment the cat struggled in the girl's grip and she grinned turning towards the older man. Black curls flowed around a small heart-shaped face with a straight nose and even in this youthful face was the promise of great beauty in the future. Her face, hair and the happiness always reminded Minerva of paintings of Bocaccio she had seen in Rome during her brief stint of work for the ICW. Tall heather swayed in an unfelt wind and in the distance one could see the walls of an old cottage and a farm.

The old grandfather hefted an ornately carved walking stick over his shoulder while staring seriously into the camera and the edge of his kilt swayed in the wind. The holster of a pine wand nearly vanished in the swaying folds. Even in the black and white of the picture, the bold pattern of Clan Ross was easily discernible and Minerva caressed the glass of the frame with slightly trembling fingers.

 

_Leidgh mi leat sìos, màthair..._

 

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**18th November, Saturday, Hogsmeade weekend, waxing crescent moon**

Snow had come to Hogwarts over the night and the Highlands around the school had turned white. It had led to some impromptu snowball fights in the courtyard in the morning. After a walking snowman, courtesy of Fred and George had begun to pester the sixth and seventh-year girls and Ron Weasley, the Professors had tried to break them up. That attempt had ended with Flitwick being engulfed by an avalanche launched from the ramparts and the pupils spending the rest of the break indoors.

Everyone was a bit out of sorts since today was the day most of the younger years were allowed to visit Hogsmeade, the small wizarding town opposite the school. The happiness was exuberant and everyone was looking forward to leaving the castle for a few hours.

For his part, Harry hadn't found a reason to be happy when the morning rituals and Breakfast were over. Everyone had plans for the afternoon and most of the kids had gushed about the novelty of visiting Great Britains only full wizarding town without parents...and Harry wasn't allowed to go.

Vernon hadn't signed the permission slip sent with the school Owl at the beginning of the summer holiday. Actually, there was a snowball's chance in hell he would ever sign everything for the „freak" after Harry had blown up his sister like a Hot-Air Balloon.

It was only natural that Harry felt the need to mop around and feel miserable after he had seen his friends off to town. Ron had been fired up about going and had declared to buy as much from Honeydukes as his already enchanted pockets could carry. Hermione had just smiled and had pulled her black school robes around her against the cold.

In hindsight, he marvelled at the picture of opposites his two friends had presented. Hermione had looked immaculately put together, pale and obviously bone-tired next to an energetic and exuberant Ron. There had been crumbs from breakfast on his shirt and Scabbers had watched the surroundings from a slightly torn robe pocket. He had looked like a random street bum next to the girl and it highlighted the differences between Harry's friends like a glaring flashlight.

The dark almost bruised looking shadows under Hermoine's eyes had him worried. Since school had started he hardly had seen her outside of a classroom. Sometimes she was late for lunch or dinner and that one time in November Ron and himself had found her asleep in the library in the Ancient Runes section. Every time class let out she practically vanished and wouldn't give a satisfactory explanation for her whereabouts. Everyone around her had noticed it after a time and it had let to a lot of nasty rumours, especially after one evening when she had shown up in the dorms long after curfew.

Harry worried. Hermione had become snappish of late and it needed very little at the moment to set her off. Her rows with Ron about Crookshanks were the stuff of legends according to some of his dormmates.

Maybe it was the Dementors affecting her more than she let on. The mood now at the days of Hogsmeade-weekend had been solemn and almost melancholic. Harry had witnessed two second years breaking into tears on their way to Care of Magical Creatures. Everyone was acting a bit strange this year round.

He raised his gaze to the edge of the Forbidden Forest and there, hidden in the gloom of the trees and dark clouds, he could make out the fluttering dark whispy cloaks and shivered. Professor Lupin had told him everyone dealt differently with the emotions the creatures invoked and Harry had to admit the man had been right. He already had noticed different behaviour in his year mates.

Although the DADA lesson had given him a boost Neville had been a bundle of nerves. He was easily startled like a rabbit nowadays and withdrew to the Greenhouse as often as possible. Dean, as he was sleeping next to the Longbottom boy, had mentioned him having trouble sleeping when they had found him curled up on the sofa three nights in a row in October.

Dean and Seamus were, at first sight, the ones to be at least affected but after longer observation one noticed the tired bags under Dean's eyes and Seamus jokes had become somewhat cruel and repetitive.

Colin Creevy the small first, now a second year, was acting like a mouse on the run. He flitted in and out of the common room, was startled by the slightest noise and had a lot of problems concentrating.

Ron was the biggest can of worms though. Harry knew his best mate had quite a temper on him, but the almost constant aggressive or passive-aggressive behaviour of the ginger boy was startling. Ron would fly off the handle for the most insignificant things. Two days ago he had almost started a fight in the common room when Dean's football had rolled under his bed during a game of catch with Seamus.

Even worse was his behaviour towards Hermione. Harry hadn't really forgotten that the Weasley boy had been the reason why Hermione had been in the girls' toilet on Halloween two years ago and it was disconcerting to see the boy from back then emerge again. Especially when Ron had brought that particular night back to mind when he had started his first row of the year with Hermione at the middle of September.

He had accused her of being „a bloody nightmare" just like her cat and Harry, who had been sitting in front of the fireplace had seen all colour leave Hermione's face. After that day it only had gotten worse. He mostly had tried to stay out of the drama but Ron seemed to find an almost perverse pleasure in riling the girl up until she was almost in tears.

He would have to have a talk with his mate. Maybe he didn't have the perfect upbringing with his abusive relatives but he knew that this was not how to treat a girl.

Just as he had decided to actually go through with his resolution a heavy hand landed on his shoulder. In the next moment, he had been pulled in a small alcove hiding behind one of the numerous banners which decorated the school walls. It felt rather crowded when Harry opened his eyes and he whirled around, wand in hand.

„Whoa, Harry! Hold your horses!"

Flaming red hair, matching grins and two pairs of raised hands greeted his sight.

„What do you two want?"

He held his wand steady and still raised while he tried to always have both of the Weasley twins in his sight. If he had learned something in three years then it was to never totally trust the two pranksters to not pull the wool over his eyes

„Well, well ..."

„We just thought to give you ..."

„An early Christmas present!"

Fred, or George, Harry was never entirely sure, pulled something from his robes pocket with a flourish, while the other twin hustled Harry into an empty classroom next to the alcove. It was a plain and old piece of parchment the size of a notebook that landed on the table. Though, apparently, it was much bigger than that. Harry could see the creases were it had been folded multiple times.

„Well, it is Hogsmeade weekend. We realized that you're not allowed to go..."

„Since Black is after your hide, we thought you could use a bit of cheer.

Fred slowly began to unfold the parchment all the while behaving like a circus director presenting the next act.

„We decided to present you with it. We've learned all we've could from it and it's time to give it to someone worthy of the name."

Harry's eyebrows raised while he stared at the blank piece of paper.

„You're pulling my leg...Look, boys, if this is the new scheme of yours..."

„No, Harry. No."

George raised his hands to placate him while Fred raised his wand above the parchment.

„No Harry. This isn't simple parchment and we're not trying to have you on."

The redhead grinned broadly at him and nudged Harry towards the scratched desk.

„THIS, "Fred's wand tapped against the bleached surface and he flashed another grin at his brother. „Is the reason for our success." He held the stick against the folded part and whispered:

„I solemnly swear I am up to no good."

Green began to bloom on the parchment-like someone had carelessly dropped it on it until the blotches began to form themselves into a stylish and cursive script. Both Fred and George stood to the side, grinning like loons and whispered:

„We proudly present the map to our success!"

True to their words, almost the same wording had formed before Harry in a slanting green font.

 

**Messrs Padfoot, Mooney, Wormtail and Prongs proudly present**

**THE MARAUDER'S MAP**

„We grabbed it from Filch in our first year."

„Yeah..." George looked wistfully into the distance.

„That was the moment we've discovered the greatness of Dungbombs..." he trailed off.

Harry took a step towards the desk and could see tiny colourful dots flitting around the surface in neatly drawn squares representing the rooms in the castle. He could see A.P.W. Dumbledore pacing in circles in his office.

„You can see everyone on this map, as long as he's on castle grounds.

With a slight smile, Fred pointed to a small green dot right next to the Grand Staircase.

„It is how we kept track on the teachers and Mrs Norris. We sincerely hope that you'd use it for some right mischief and since Christmas is upon us..."

Both took a bow in front of the smaller boy and George opened the door.

„It's a present Harry and..." he turned around again suddenly with a mock haughty look on his face.

„...if you're getting caught with we'll deny even knowing you. So use it wisely."

Now demonstrating an even deeper bow than before both redheads shuffled towards the door.

„Of course, should you use it to sneak into Hogsmeade on such a fine day as this...Who are we to say anything about it."

Both twins flashed their teeth at him. It was a look more at home on a certain mad cat's face and both vanished down the hall.

Harry stood in the empty room for a few seconds staring at the map as if a troll had beaten him over the head with his favourite club. Then his eyes fell on the little dot, which was actually a small paw print, turning around the corner and his decision was made.

After a few minutes and one Cloak of Invisibility snatched from the dorms Harry felt kinda dumb sneaking around the hallway looking for a secret passage. The ugly statue of a one-eyed, humpbacked witch was standing before the only entrance he had seen on the paper around their hiding place. He whipped out the map. Maybe he was at the wrong turn in the hall.

Instead, he saw the dot with his name label next to it, quite a surreal feeling in hindsight, grow out a tiny line and tap the statue of the witch three times on the hump. The word Dissendium floated in a little scroll above him.

Harry shrugged and did what the map had told him. As soon as his wand had touched the hump of the statue for the third time it rolled away and revealed a dark tunnel out of the castle. If Harry would have known to what he would be privy to later in the day, he would have wished that he'd never opened the tunnel at that moment

 

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Remus had had a difficult week. As he stood right next to the big windows in his classroom he could almost hear Moony pacing behind him.

The weeks since October had been slow and sluggish and in a moment of desperate moment of weakness, he had promised Harry to teach him the defence against Dementors. All his excuses for his distance had evaporated in the face of the earnest boy staring at him with the eyes of his first friend. He had remembered the promise he had given Lily and after the confrontation with her son, had refused to eat in the Great Hall for days.

Guilt and shame had almost eaten him alive and the bottle in his trunk had been so very tempting.

Surprisingly it had been Moony who had pulled him back from the edge of this vicious cycle of self-destruction. The wolf had simply pointed out the uselessness of crying over spilt milk. If Remus wanted to regain his honour and seek atonement for his abandoning of the oaths he had taken for his friends, what would be better than getting his ass in gear and actually doing something about it?

Tentatively he had tried to form some communication with the quiet boy. It wasn't easy, but Harry slowly warmed up to him and didn't ask difficult questions. Remus found it odd and had begun to observe his honorary nephew more closely. What he had learned from observation alone and alarmed him.

Harry didn't question other peoples motives. He was far too trusting and he expected to be treated like year old crap the same time. Remus shuddered at the thought and wondered what live the boy exactly led outside of school. So far he could tell it wasn't very good. He had seen Harry never bat an eye when Snape and Draco Malfoy poured out their bile over him but he got extremely defensive when his friends were mentioned. The boy was fiercely loyal and utterly hopeless at the same time.

The human had been horrified when Moony had pointed out to him that Remus himself had used to behave like that in his first years at Hogwarts and sometimes still did. It was a habit which ironically James had tried to cure him of.

The wolf had been strangely subdued as he had talked to him about what Remus now after some long weekend trips to London knew as the symptoms of very low self-esteem and the begin of a long term depression.

It had been hard cramping the small giggling baby boy he had known and held in his arms in the same space with the now despondent and disillusioned teenager. It had been even harder to realize to realize that he hadn't been able to prevent all of this so long ago. Though, it had steeled his resolve to never let another person run his life again.

He had distanced himself from the Headmaster and only showed up at the staff meetings as required and was the first to leave at the end. He noticed the furtive glances Dumbledore did send into his direction every time and he felt angry about it. In the evenings before the full moon he had a lot of time to think and since September his talks with the wolf had become increasingly disturbing for his state of mind. It was like he had his own personal shrink in his head and he was pointing out all the things he didn't want to know.

His gaze ran from the entrance to the carriages waiting on the path and he caught a glimpse of the other kid in his life.

Hermione had begun to visit him regularly after that embarrassing evening in November. Always she had some book or books with her, was full of questions and left with even more books again. He had begun to appreciate her dry wit, so similar to his own, and it was a delight to hold a dispute with her. Frankly, Remus suspected that she was bored in the rather rigid system at Hogwarts. In his eyes, she was like Sirius in his best years. Very intelligent but missing a challenge...only she had no desire to stir up trouble just for the sake of it out of boredom. Her intelligence was a welcome difference after a long day of teaching literal kids. He had noticed very soon that Hermione seemed far more mature than her peers, but at times while pouring over tomes in his office and discussing the various happenings in the school the young girl peeked through her convoluted speeches and sometimes snobbish behaviour. It endeared her to him more than he had realised in the beginning and most of the times nowadays he held watch over her as well as Harry.

It was the reason he found her condition since the start of December so worrying. Two times already she had fallen asleep at his desk on the drop of the hat and the increasingly defined shadows under her eyes and her slight frame becoming even thinner had both human and wolf worried. Also, her temper seemed to fray at the edges as the month drew towards his end.

That strange presence was almost constantly around her now and still did Moony berate him for his puzzlement. He had been fortunate enough to discover the reason for Hermione's problems by accident. She had been twisting the medallion of a necklace around her throat when he had seen her in one of the empty corridors on his evening patrols. She had vanished into thin air after this and a few minutes later Remus had seen her climbing the stairs towards Gryffindor Tower. It was no wonder she looked like butter spread over too many toasts.

What had Albus been thinking when he granted the use of a time-turner to a small girl of 13 years. She was running herself ragged, probably living the same day twice...Remus growled against the coloured glass unconsciously.

Of course, he had informed Minerva of his suspicions and the old teacher hadn't reacted at all at first. There had been a strange fire in her eyes and she seemed occupied when she had let Remus swear to keep an eye on „her little lion". He still wondered about that specific wording.

Stress was a major factor in Hermione's altered behaviour and it had all come to clash in one spectacular display only he had been privy too. Draco Malfoy had proofed to be the son of his father so far. The boy had shown the same condescending behaviour and upper-class mannerism so distinct to Lucius' teaching in his behaviour that Remus actually wondered how often Narcissa was allowed to see her own son.

The woman had been a rather gentle soul in school and Remus remembered Sirius being devastated at the statement that his favourite cousins were either going insane, cast out of the family or being bought off by a wealthy husband. Narcissa hadn't chosen to rebel like her sister Andromeda but it was obvious that she had very little influence in raising her son.

Remus had found out the usual modus-operandi of a Malfoy very soon into the school year. It was one of the situations in which his advanced hearing was more of a curse than a blessing. He hadn't counted how often the little idiot had tried to discredit him in class or how often he could hear the insults towards his classmates muttered under the boy's breath. Moony had suggested a severe trashing after the first week but it hadn't been worth the risk so far. Remus had to take a much more subtle approach. It was funny how often the Malfoy heir found himself either with a paralysing fear of whatever they had in the next Herbology Class or with rather disturbing and horrifying dreams of a certain Hippogryff. It had been funny to see the dark circles under the eyes of his goons and both human and the wolf had chuckled under their breath when they had seen the boy running away screaming from a fanged geranium. Draco Malfoy's pride sure had gotten a dent in those weeks.

However, it had only led to a very bad confrontation between the Malfoy scion and his most favourite victim. One week ago he had found Hermione being harassed by Draco in the hallway to his office. Moony had almost spilt over when he had understood what the little git had implied in his convoluted speech.

Remus knew his dealings with Hermione probably smacked of favouritism though obviously, she had forgotten about the famous Hogwarts Rumor Mill.

Draco was talking about her granting „special favours" to him in exchange for better grades and had wondered aloud if the girl had decided to do that with all of the teachers available. Hermione had just stood there right in front of his door and held one of the borrowed books before her like a shield. Draco hadn't noticed her staring at him with cold golden eyes. Moony had felt the discharge of energy in the air and had propelled his human to act.

Malfoy's son had fled in the face of a teachers ire and Remus had followed Hermione, who had left the scene in rapid step and with suspiciously focused eyes. He hadn't been prepared at all for what he had witnessed than in the next unused classroom a few seconds later.

The doorknob had been hot and Remus narrowly avoided a burnt hand as he witnessed the metal beginning to glow cherry red. The wolf was frantically howling and growling in his head and so he had ignored the pain and had nearly ripped the door away from its hinges in fright.

She had stood in the middle of the room staring out of the closed window while a small vortex of clouds and rain had raged around her like a miniature hurricane. As the door splintered in his grip she had turned around and for the first time since he had been bitten by Fenrir Greyback as a child, he had felt hunted. 

There had been no recognition in her golden gaze, just rage and unmentionable grief, while her magic conjured rain and lightning out of thin air and an invisible wind howled and whipped at her hair. Moony immediately had pushed him to the floor in a gesture of submission and he had been able to get a few precious steps near her.

The air was heavy with pressure and stank of ozone and suddenly Hermione had snarled, viciously long canines on full display and launched her small body towards him. Remus had tried to scramble out of the way but the second he had turned away from her she had been upon him. Sharp and hardened fingernails had scored his old tweed jacket and he thought himself being done for when the small girl atop of him suddenly had lunged for his throat. She stopped barely an inch before his face and Remus desperately tried to keep still when one curiously long-nailed hand had touched his scarred face almost tentatively. A blue light had bloomed between them and he could see the small flashes of lightning in Hermione's hair chasing around her head as the girl collapsed above him.

Remus had gathered her things and had carried her off to the Hospital Wing. Poppy had looked at him strangely and bristling inside he had told the healer of Hermione's subsequent exhaustion after finding her on the floor in one of the corridors during his patrol. Pomfrey had backed off and had diagnosed the still unconscious girl with severe exhaustion. Gritting his teeth in frustration Remus had left the nurse to her devices.

It had been a week ago and when he had tried to inform Minerva about her favourite student, every attempt had been thwarted by the preparation for Hogsmeade-weekend. Sirius' flight had transformed the otherwise harmless outing into a logistical nightmare in regards of security and Remus had cursed his old friend for a minute and had felt extremely guilty in the next second. He, himself, wouldn't have lasted a week in that blasted prison.

His musings brought him back to the small shadows racing down the path towards the carriages and he fervently wished everything he had done so far and still could do would be enough to protect Harry and his friends.

 

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Minerva pinched her nose in an attempt to stave off the oncoming headache. Two weeks had come and gone since that Quidditch-Game. Young Harry Potter had shown no lingering effect from his injuries nor any disadvantages and nothing, she had held a sharp eye over the boy. Still, she marvelled over his speedy recovery and still puzzled over the mysterious events in the Hospital Wing.

The boy showed no sign of distress but he'd gone quieter in the last days. Hogsmeade weekend was imminent and Minerva had a lot of tasks to finish until she could dismiss the children to the small village. Unbiddingly her focus wavered to the small girl with a wild mane of dark curls passing her on her way to class.

She still had to sort her head. Hermione Granger wasn't behaving vastly different than before but Minerva had a distinct impression that the girl's conduct should be different. The report Remus had given her had been worrying and she had vowed to keep an even closer eye on her charge and on Harry. Either Hermione was truly unaffected or she was a very good actor. What had Albus been thinking when he gave the girl...her grand-niece a time turner.

It led her thoughts down a dangerous lane at the moment. Her new acknowledgement of certain memories resurfacing was both parts freeing and igniting furious thoughts of revenge. It was a problem with Albus wandering the castle all nilly-willy. It was hard to be in the same room as the old man and Minerva still had only a vague picture of what exactly he had done.

Random pictures frayed at the edges, like being burned, always with a giant of a man with curly hair and a small wild-haired woman who bore some resemblance. She had needed days to distinguish memories from each other and whole days again to realize that those two people were probably Hermione's parents. Her nephew and his wife.

She clearly remembered visiting the Grangers in the first year, though the familiarity had been completely missing. Every time she pondered this she saw herself fuming before the gryphon on Albus door, a wave of sudden anger and indignation taking her almost over.

Her head hurt and for a moment she played with the thought of calling in sick. It was only for a moment but then her gaze fell on Pomona Sprout heaving a sigh while she was leaving the Great Hall and despite an oncoming headache she resolved to carry on. She had a meeting to attend in Hogsmeade while the kids were running around the village.

 

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Hermione was unsure if the day was being good or bad so far. No one had tried to trip her in the halls, the whispers behind her back had been curiously quiet and Ron had been unusually kind to her. Also, her advanced hearing didn't seem to bother her so much anymore. She still could hear the taunts and insults whispered around but she had exercised her oldest coping techniques and had simply ignored them.

He had promised Madame Pomfrey to keep her stress levels low after she had found herself in the Hospital Wing last week after, according to the nurse, severe exhaustion, but so far it didn't matter how often or how long she slept she still felt tired all the day. Poppy Pomfrey had assured her that those symptoms would vanish in a few days but it was exhausting and quite frankly humiliating. She was just glad that apparently the teachers already knew about her diminished condition. It was only strange she couldn't remember anything about the day she had fainted.

Even Professor McGonagall had a sharp eye on her and Draco Malfoy after she had discovered him harassing Hermione on her way to Arithmancy just two days ago. She had noticed the professor following her with her eyes and suspected the old lady had been following her in her cat form since then. It had been a shock to find a pass for the library and the restricted section signed by McGonagall on her bed the same evening. It was mindblowing. Sure she liked the older woman a lot despite the tough surface but Hermione couldn't, for the life of her, remember what she had done to be awarded this special attention.

After Lunch, she had found out the reason for Ron's nice behaviour. Hogsmeade had interested her on a scientific level, it was the only full wizard town remaining in Britain after all. Finding out that Ron only had asked her because Harry probably wasn't allowed to go, that had hurt a bit. In the end, she had decided to simply enjoy the day as it was and resolved to get lots of stuff for Harry too.

Unbidden her gaze wandered up the wall of the castle and for a flash second, she saw a blue glow in one of the windows. Somehow she had the feeling someone was watching over her from up there. I lacked the feeling and the alertness she normally associated with danger. Ever sinc3e coming into the magical world 3 years ago she had learned to trust her instincts. A troll had seen to it and it had saved her life when she had decided to use Penelope Clearwater's mirror when they had left the library in the second year.

The vehemence of those feelings was surprising and a bit unsettling but as long as nothing presented itself as dangerous she would be cautious and listen a lot more to herself. Right now she felt secure and protected and wouldn't second guess herself and enjoy the trip to the village.

 

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Harry was furious. How dare they keep all this information from him. Black had supposedly betrayed his parents and everyone and their mother knew about it but had decided it wasn't necessary to hold him up to date. No, it would be far better letting the sit around like a fool and so much bait.

That was what he was maybe, bait for a very dangerous wizard. After all Black had found an entrance into the castle, could apparently come and go as he pleased and nobody saw fit to warn Harry except for a rather vague „Don't you go looking for him." Harry snorted. The ruddy wizard was looking for him, not the other way around.

Memories from the first year flashed through his mind. Quirrell and his turban, Dumbledore telling him everything would be alright and Hogwarts was safe. Safe...Harry would bet his own ass that the staff had still no clue how the traitor had actually entered the castle. It was like the Chamber of Secrets all over again.

Scaring Malfoy half to death had been therapeutic and hearing Hermione laugh together with Ron had balm on his wounded soul. Snape had put a stopper on this and again. Harry could feel his ire rising. The hook-nosed teacher had actually threatened him and nobody had done something about it again.

Maybe he should go to sleep...everyone in the dorm was already snoring and Harry's gaze went to the staircase towards the girl's dorm. He knew that Hermione often would sit down in the common room when she couldn't sleep. Maybe she was still there...he could use the company and the girl always had good advice.

With a quiet Lumos on the tip of his wand, he stumbled towards the door when something small and furry scrambled between his legs and almost caused him to faceplant into the wall.

Scabbers sat in the bluish light of his wand, a strange gleam in his small button eyes. He raised his head as if to test the air and with a nervous twitch and squeak he vanished under Dean's bed. Hermione's cat had appeared in the door sending a baleful glare towards the retreating rat. Before Crookshanks could even twitch a paw Harry had already picked him up and carried the now squirming cat towards the common room.

Hermione was indeed sitting in front of the fireplace with a small notebook in front of her. She looked lost in thought and Harry simply plunked down next to her. Crookshanks squirmed out of his arms with an indignant huff, head-butted his mistress' knee and curled up in one of the small cat baskets at the side of the fireplace. His friend hadn't said a word or had acknowledged his presence and simply stared into the flames. Harry was getting worried.

It was so unlike the girl to space out without reading and he raised a hand towards her shoulder. Suddenly her head swivelled around and she slowly blinked at him. Her brown eyes glowed amber in the low light and again she slowly blinked.

She often would stare at people for a long time but at the moment Harry found it a bit frightening. A small smile appeared on her face like she was coming out of a daze and one of her small hands touched his cheek. A slightly hoarse „Harry..." left her lips and nothing more. Crookshanks murred next to her, an imperious paw lifted like he was begging for a high-five and Hermione, with her gaze still on her friend, simply drew him into her lap.

Only the crack and sizzle of the fire was being heard in the utter silence that reigned then. Harry was left to think again. Still, Hermione's fingers were touching his cheek while she seemed to look right through him. Her disposition had apparently become worse since the last time he had found her on the couch at four o'clock in the morning. This had been right after his spectacular fall on the Quidditch Pitch but now the bags under her eyes were becoming even more pronounced and it was so unlike her to space out for hours. Maybe he shouldn't saddle her with his own problems when she was already exhausted all the time.

A furry little butt suddenly planted itself on his lap and Harry winced slightly when Crookshanks turned three times and narrowly avoided his family jewels. Something was tickling his neck. Harry turned his head and there was a mass of hair right in front of him. Hermione's head was resting on his shoulder and she was out like a light. For a moment he contemplated leaving her on the couch alone, but Crookshanks flexed his claws on his thigh and Harry immediately abandoned this idea.

There was a strange humming in his blood, he felt energized instead of sleepy and his hands tingled at the fingertips. Despite all that he felt his eyelids dropping the longer he stared into the flames. At first, he tried to fight it. The feeling was far to sudden and strange to feel natural but in the end, the warm weight of the cat-kneazle in his lap and Hermione's head on his shoulder caused him to succumb to this strange spell if sleepiness. Just before he lost himself in the dreamlands he was fascinated by a slight blue glow that emerged from his fingers.

 

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The werewolf didn't have a peaceful night. He was still mulling over the strange happenings around Hermione. The wolf in him wasn't being really helpful at the moment.

_**You've got a memory like a sieve, bachgen. A remarkable achievement for someone hasn't been to Azkaban.** _

Remus made a face of half-disgust at the mirror while he could observe how his eyes turned golden. For now, there was a light green ring around the pupil with the rest of the eye being a deep honey gold.

_Merlin, if I looked like this before her...no wonder I could smell fear._

Anger sparked within him and he had the urge to hit himself.

_**She doesn't fear you, you dimwit. She fears what you represent.** _

_You mean she fears you, wolf!_

A snarl played around the man's lips in the mirror.

**_Sweet Arianrhod. It's like every time I decide to talk to you about everything important you become dumber by the minute._ **

Unbidden his left hand rose towards his face. With a look of horror on his now normal face, Remus pulled it down.

_I would thank you to NOT try to take over my body!_

**_Oh please...Cut me some slack here, bachgen. I'm working with limited resources here and I have to take you up to date very quick or you could make a complete hash out of all this!_ **

_How come you're so knowledgable about everything? Since you're me..._

 

A fanged smile grew on Remus mirror face and the human had to clamp down hard on his rising panic.

**_All wolves are old souls, Remus. You could say I've been you a lot of times..._ **

For a few minutes, he just gaped at his mirror image until the other Remus rolled his eyes.

**_Look, did you do what I've asked you to do?_ **

_Of course, though I can't figure out what all of this would have to do with a bunch of old wives tales and legends._

 

He palmed the antique tomes sitting on the commode next to the mirror as Moony whispered to him.

**_You've never wondered about your name? What do you remember about the texts?_ **

 

_Well....there's Laignech Fáelad. A man who used to go into the shape of wolves and his offspring used to go after him. They used to kill the herds after the fashion of the wolves and it is for that he was to be called Laignech Fáelad, for he was the first of them who went out into a wolf-shape. He was a brother of Feradach Mac Duach and was famous for it._

**_Hmmm...?_ **

_Are you implying I'm descendant of a line of Irish kings?_

**_I don't know for sure, Remus. Though, part of your family went to Wales during the Norman Invasion. I can't recall the name back then but one of your great-great-great Grandfathers married a French witch and the name got changed to Lupin._ **

_Great, so I'm from a line of ancient werewolves, even BETTER!!_

 

The usual wave of resentment rising inside of him was strong and vicious but was disappearing so fast it was giving Remus whiplash. With a shocked expression, he noticed that the wolf had again regained control and had sat them both down on his bed.

He spluttered mentally.

 

_What...What exactly are you!?_

A soothing feeling, like the fur of a long forgotten teddybear, pressed into his arms washed over him. Moony's voice, so often sarcastic and harsh was now almost crooning.

**_Oh Remus, fy bachgen. You remember being sometimes jealous of Sirius and James. For their families and how they bragged about the family magic.?_ **

He felt meek and twelve again as the wolf pointed at that old aching wound. He had come to terms with his family situation, though it still hurt a lot. He nodded forgetting that the entity inside his head couldn't exactly see it.

**_Well, you shouldn't have been. I was there the whole time, literally screaming in your face..._ **

 

Every hair on his arms stood up when those words registered. Suddenly the room became too small, his lungs heaved for air and he could smell a hint burnt ozone. Just as fast a warm blanket seemed to be pulled over him and he felt violently ill for a few seconds.

**_Keep it down, boy! Yes, you could say I'm the family magic....to an extent. I would have come naturally to you but Greyback, unfortunately, speed things along and the treatment of your condition let yourself splinter. It's the reason he's afraid of you, you know. I'll explain it later. Now be still and listen._ **

Moony released a hacking sound in Remus' head and the man's head hit the pillow behind him.

 

**_In the old days when Lugh and his people still walked the earth and the gods were but a stones distance from mortal people there lived a man near Kilculliheen on the coast between Leinster and Munster. He had a great herd of cattle with one big entirely black bull, who is said to be the ancestor of the great bull Donn Cullaigne. War was coming to his home in these days since it was the days of war against the Fomorians and the foreign sons of Mil._ **

**_One day, as he was chasing a heifer and its mother who had gotten away from the herd on their way to the field down the River Suir. When he heard a great cry come from a ford downstream from him. He followed the noise, a wild yowling and screaming when he saw two warriors, wreathed in shadows and glowing red eyes. They both tried to beat and stab at a great big black wolf in the middle of the ford. Its paws were stuck between rocks in the riverbed and it was already bleeding from its side._ **

**_Back then everyone knew magic and often invoked the gods for doing it since the gods had been the ones to bless people with magic. So he raised his hand at the men and threw a spell at the two dark beings. They were confounded and he proceeded to beat on them with his walking stick made of the finest ash wood. The Fomorian warriors routed and fled the ford promising retribution on him his herd and his family but he laughed in their frightened faces. He had reasons to be concerned though. Back in the days, a spoken word was powerful and a curse was easily uttered._ **

**_He returned to regard the beast at his back. Alas, where the wolf had snarled and gnashed his teeth at his assailants, there stood a lady. She was fair like the dames of the Tuatha but darkly cast, like a cloud of ravens flying over the sun and the lad backed away from her._ **

**_„I thank you for your help, boy. You weren's afraid to go to battle." Her voice was like the silky fur of a cat on his ears and so he stayed and listened._ **

**_„You're no warrior, but a herder. A cattle-boy and a farmer but I will elevate you in the eyes of everyone around you."_ **

**_She drew near to him and laid a long-fingered hand on his head. Her touch was like ice and fire on his skin but he repressed his shudders and gazed upon her._ **

**_„Hear me farmer-boy, „ the Lady spoke „ I will give you a better weapon than a mere stick to protect yourself and what you hold dear. Nothing is more ferocious than a beast in righteous anger and I will give you claws and fangs and a rare gift among your kind. „_ **

**_The coldness spread and for a moment he closed his eyes and when he opened them again he was on four feet. Long teeth and fur had sprouted in his mouth and on his skin._ **

**_„ Ferocious like the wolf you'll be, wise like the raven and your anger will bring ruin to your enemies and your friends will know a safety from everything."_ **

**_She raised her hands from him and her dark and black eyes turned golden for a moment and she smiled. It was a terrible smile, full of sharp teeth and dark promises_ **

**_„But be wary..." she said. „No wolf likes to wander alone and easily could my gift be turned against you. So guard your heart and choose wisely among your friends for I'll give you the ability to truly see them as they are." and he saw her wrapped in grey smoke and shining light and it was such a terrible sight he closed his eyes and the Lady vanished._ **

**_Much later the war between Ulster and Connacht broke out the men of Connacht came to the coast to steal the herd of the man. He rescued a maid from the village he lived in as he fell upon her attackers like the wolf he had become in his anger. Connacht never came to the coast again and the man married and had three sons, every one of them bearing the Lady's gift and he became the ancestor of a great many heroes of the times that came and went away._ **

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leidgh mi leat sìos, màthair... - I let you down, mother...  
> Fy bachgen - my boy
> 
> \-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> So far this was and is the longest chapter written by me so far. Sorry for the long wait but with my attention span writing exceedingly long chapters is a bit of work.  
> I'd like to hope that I've got the gaelic (scots and wales) correct. If you all find any mistakes please notify me.  
> Have fun reading. ^^

**Author's Note:**

> This is only the first part of the proloque, so bear with me, please.  
> No one thought Fleamont and his family would show up on the funeral, actually half of England believes  
> him to be dead since so one heard from him for so long.  
> I hope I could get you interested. ^^


End file.
